SITE NEWS Boycott Madonna's Maverick Films' "Material Girls" movie and Paris Hilton's new CD

Please boycott Madonna's film company's rip off Material Girls movie, starring Hilary Duff. It is one of the films ripped off from my copyrighted catalog, a film script synopsis that was over five years old when they stole it. I penned and copyrighted a script titled "My Sister's Keeper" and another called "Contemporary Girl" after my song of the same name featured on this site, which Madonna and co. later ripped off and renamed the script "Material Girl" after her song of the same name then "Material Girls."

Their criminal copyright infringing film Material Girls is a rip off of my script and the theme of my song "Contemporary Girl" about modern female CEOs. It has nothing to do with Madonna's song "Material Girl" about using men for their money. My script was about two sisters fighting for control of a family owned company, of which one was the CEO. That is the plot for Material Girls the movie.

Proving once again Madonna belongs nowhere near a film set in any capacity, whether it be acting, production or otherwise, the previews of this film reeks. Pure fluff. Inane nonsense. They stole my 2001 script and tried to turn it into 2004's Mean Girls 2. 

Please boycott Paris Hilton's new atrocious CD (It stinks anyway, you're not missing anything, I've heard the clips) where she ripped off items from my already copyrighted work that she got from fellow Kabbalah cult member and the label they share, Warner Bros. As I wrote in last month's Column, both the video and bass line for Paris' cruddy debut single "Stars Are Blind" were stolen from my copyrighted catalog that Madonna and Warner Bros got their dirty hands on a copy of.

Don't reward them for being thieves that rip off hard working people who actually work to earn a living - instead of stealing everyone else's and relying on money they didn't earn like degenerates.

Please boycott both projects, which are released this August. Thank you.

RANDOM THOUGHTS For People Who Think Randomly

1. Why is it people who have the most material things are often the most dissatisfied in life.

2. Why do people associate money with accomplishment when there are men and women who sleep their way to the top. That's not an accomplishment.

3. You ever wonder why money can't buy class. There are poor people who have style, grace and manners - yet there are rich who appear to get dressed in the dark and don't have basic common courtesy. There was a modest earning English singer who designed clothes and she made an $8 thrift store dress look like a masterpiece. While a few other music attendees at the show wore very expensive dresses that simply looked gaudy.

4. Why is Tom everyone's friend on My Space. He must be well connected and get a lot of birthday gifts (just kidding, I know he's on staff):

ART The Mona Lisa    

The Mona Lisa  

The Mona Lisa is thought of as a symbol of beauty, but tell the truth, she was a chick with a bad brow job.

If someone did that to your eyebrows you’d be mad. If one of your friends left a salon with her brows like that, you’d be like, “Girl, what did they do to you?!”

OK, I was wrong for that joke. You know I will never be accepted in any formal art museum after making a joke about the Mona Lisa, right (they better if they know what’s good for them - joking).

Seriously, what is that - the Brazilian wax for brows or something?

TRAVEL Aisha’s Rules Of Air Travel And Bargain Hunting 

(Aisha sounding like a network expose reporter) Rates too good to be true? Do read the fine print, as some deals just aren’t deals at all. Some airlines to avoid: 

1. If the lowest rate is by an airline called “Air Osama” whose slogan is “Americans Welcomed” pass that one up.  

2. If it’s an airline that calls for you to switch planes mid-air, avoid that deal. Dry land connections are always best. 

3. If it’s an airline with the slogan “Never be separated from your luggage” – um, that’s a cargo plane and it’s best to buy your tickets elsewhere. 

4. Many of you alcoholheads have heard the slogan B.Y.O.B. (Bring your own beer). With fuel prices climbing, you may see a slogan that reads B.Y.O.G. (Bring your own gas). Avoid that little discount. The “ticket cheaper if you bring your own gas” isn’t always the best deal. 

5. Aisha Air – Uh, I don’t have an airline. 

6. Eron air…ok, that’s basically self-explanatory.  

Speaking of that… 

I saw a show on a news channel in my hotel room on June 30, 2006, where the host, Anderson Cooper (ooo they are so trying to out you – they want to superman you), noted Al Qaeda’s technological capabilities in the professionally produced terrorist threat video they released.  

In the last Column on June 26, 2006, I commented that they clearly have technology in place. That video is more proof that they do.

The video I saw a clip of on the news that was released on the 30^th had titles and lighting. Who does he think he is, Osama Spielberg?  

You know what really ticked me off – those terrorists are using better film editing software than me. Oh the injustice!   

CELEBRITY The Official Negro Picture Pose

Two talented entertainers illustrating the official Negro Picture Pose (LOL - work it):

Cedric the Entertainer (left) and Terrence Howard (right) @ the Essence Music Festival

Speaking of Cedric, here's a pic of him with his adorable kids:

Cedric: son, smile for the camera like me
Son: OK, Daddy
Daughter: oh no they didn't! look at them embarrassing me in public!

(Just kidding) but his kids are so cute.

CELEBRITY Angelina Jolie Reportedly Given Jennifer Aniston's Part By Pitt

Jennifer Aniston

And the steal Jennifer Aniston's life phase 5 is complete. It was reported that a potential Academy Award winning role that was once Jennifer Aniston's has now been given to Angelina Jolie by her ex-husband and his film production company Plan B (well, not Angelina's ex-husband, Aniston's ex-husband, but what's it matter, as it's Hollywood and pretty soon he'll be Jolie's ex-husband too).

Boy, this is the pits, pardon the pun. It's official - they are trying to make Aniston crazy. She's right, there is a "sensitivity chip missing."

Widow of slain journalist Daniel Perl, Marianne, with their son

I do however want this particular film to be made. It is about the life of journalist Daniel Perl, who I wrote about in the Column in 2003, who was brutally murdered, beheaded, by terrorists for being Jewish. Films like these need to get made, so people can see how terrorism affects innocent bystanders just trying to live their lives. No one deserves to die for being Jewish. It was a terrible waste of life.

However, some good news for Aniston, she won a best legs survey:

"Jennifer Aniston's perfect pins - Jennifer Aniston has the most perfect legs in Hollywood according to a scientific study. The Break-Up actress beat Dukes of Hazzard actress Jessica Simpson and singer Christina Aguilera to the coveted title, in a study carried out by
electronics giant Braun.

Scientists came up with a specific formula, which involves multiplying the proportions of the leg and thigh, and the texture of skin, to calculate the perfect pair of pins.

Due to the "ideal" proportions of her legs and her smooth skin, Aniston scored an impressive 14.67, the highest score of anyone tested.

Dr Aric Sigman, who conducted the study, said: "For men, the ideal leg is shapely, full and smooth with a semi-gloss sheen. Women want the same thing - only two sizes smaller." - Bang Showbiz

LOL @ the last line.

CELEBRITY Peter Cook Scandal 

Supermodel Christie Brinkley’s husband Peter Cook, 47, cheated on her with a 19-year-old girl, Diana Bianchi. A 19 YEAR OLD! (why is one press outlet calling her stunning - the only thing stunning is that he cheated with her. His wife is more fabulous).

19-year-old Diana Bianchi

I saw a brief interview with the 19 year old on TV and she was quite proud of herself  in what she’d done. Why do I say that? Well, during the interview, she was smiling and giggling – proud to be on TV (why is she proud? you're on TV for being a h*).

She and Cook should be embarrassed. They broke up a family with two lovely children. She is no victim, regardless of what her lawyers tell her and you.  

She knew exactly what she was doing. She was accepting money and gifts from him that he left all over New York in exchange for the affair. She was selling herself to him.  

Now she’s doing the press rounds and giggling and smiling on TV. What is that? Don’t insult people’s intelligence screaming victim if you're gonna go on TV grinning.  

Show some decorum, already. People feel sorry for humble, contrite people, not prideful ones. The things you do to another in life will come back to you. They need to ask God for forgiveness, as it was wrong, and one way or another it is going to affect two innocent kids, through no fault of their own.   

He clearly has a fascination with teenage girls and one that has now wrecked his life. That kind of proclivity has ruined others as well. I think that’s a bad trait in some men – pursuing and or dating these teenage girls. It is not cute. People are laughing and snickering behind their backs about it, but they trod along thinking it looks cool. It does not.  

As a general rule, the younger the person you date, the older you look - no matter what Botox tells you.

I'm not against women dating someone older, but (men) dating teenage girls when you're in your forties (even in your thirties) looks odd.

Christie Brinkley

Personally, I think Brinkley is the most beautiful woman he’s been associated with. She’s aged so well. I really don’t know what he was thinking. He’s got a beautiful wife and two beautiful kids – but some are never satisfied until it is all threatened or taken away from them.  

That's the problem with famous men, they've got too much time on their hands, too many options and too little morals. 

CELEBRITY Pete Doherty In Rehab Again 

Kate Moss and Pete Doherty [Photo courtesy of VNN]

“Doherty 'cancels gig for rehab' Doherty has been arrested for drug possession several times. Pop band Babyshambles have pulled out of a concert in Ibiza to allow singer Pete Doherty to be treated for his drug addiction, the event promoter has said.” - BBC 

That’s good - at least he’s trying. 

CELEBRITY Britney Spears 

Britney and her son in Vanity Fair

Press-wise, this wasn’t particularly a horrible month for the Britster, but it still wasn’t a good one either:   

Britney Crying Invasion of Privacy 

BRITNEY SPEARS and KEVIN FEDERLINE are furious personal photos of a recent family vacation were stolen and then published in a US publication.

The couple enjoyed a holiday with their son, SEAN PRESTON, and were shocked when their private photos appeared in Us Weekly.

Jive Records has issued a statement on behalf of the pair, in which they claim the couple are evaluating their legal options while the matter is being investigated.

The statement reads: "While the photos depict happy family vacation memories, the couple are nevertheless outraged and saddened that their private family moments appeared in the magazine without their knowledge or consent after the photos were stolen by an unknown perpetrator." Jul 10, 2006, World Entertainment News Network

It's the same thing you all did to me regarding my Copyrighted Catalog that was copyrighted years prior that you lot (Madonna, Spears and co.) gained illegal access to and started criminally publishing under your names making ill-gotten wealth off it. So pardon me if I don't cry that Us Weekly did back to you what you all did to me.

God says you reap what you sow. What you do to others will be done back to you. No one in this world is above that.

However, she and other celebrities apparently think they are above that God installed principle and the law (Well, with Robert Mueller in office @ the FBI, celebrities are above the latter). You maybe above Mueller’s non-existent concept of justice, but you aren’t above God’s law of reaping and sowing that says what goes around comes around.  

She and the main miscreant Madonna in my lawsuit (see lawsuit for those of you who haven’t) not only ripped off what’s been on this site for years (which I can digitally prove, as everything leaves a trial on the internet), they took it a step further and gained criminal access to my private, unreleased Copyrighted Catalog of songs, music videos, scripts, book manuscripts with Madonna passing it around Hollywood to partners, associates and friends like dirty criminals, while Robert Mueller @ the FBI looks the other way. It’s what they’ve been doing to me and it’s quite hypocritical for her to cry about her privacy when they have no respect for mine.  

It’s what you all have done to many people, not just me (you know, like that kid in Indiana who didn’t have enough money to Copyright his song (even though the U.N. says a copyright is established the minute you write something) and used a poor man’s copyright (mailing a copy of the song he wrote to himself in the mail and not opening it)– then years later you and your associates willfully ripped it off, turning it into "Sometimes" – with a corrupt judge later questionably throwing out the case in your celebrity favor (hmm I wonder what brought that about) in spite of the fact that the kid had evidence in which Spears admitted it (an email).

The press reported the songs were almost identical. But Britney doesn't care as long as she get her money to buy hideous clothes and cheetos, who cares if another human being got defrauded. Well, God cares and it's going to bring misfortune in your life. Judging by how rotten things are for her now, it's safe to say it's already started.

If that kid thought he had problems copyrighting before, the price has gone up from $20 to $30 to $45, where it currently sits. That’s going to be a hardship for many writers across the country and around the world, but clearly, copyrighting is for the rich, as only they win in a Hollywood corrupted U.S. Court system, anyway.  

By the way, looking at those pics, I have to ask, what are ya’ll doing to that poor baby why he always looks so stunned: 

Britney "Not That Innocent" And Apparently Not That Nice Either

"I was hanging out a little bit," ex-employee Jon LaLane told In Touch Weekly. "She came out screaming at Kevin for lying around, then looked at me like I was to blame." The next day, LaLane, says he got a call from Spears' people, telling him not to report for work....[Jon] has a band, and he says he and K-Fed would talk music. But, he claims, Spears would get jealous when her hubby talked to anyone else. "She wants Kevin on a leash...She fires everybody. I figured, 'Why not me?' I just didn't expect her to be so mean." He adds: "It's a revolving door there. She's not the nice person everyone thinks she is." - In Touch

Britney Takes People’s Labor For Granted 

A few former bodyguards have sued Britney Spears for non-payment. They said they worked round the clock and were dismissed without pay. And amazingly, that court case where she is clearly in the wrong is going in her favor as well (hmmm wonder why). 

Britney with nanny/bodyguard/personal shopper/McDonalds-food-fetcher Perry (I hope his check clears):

Britney littering (illegal in LA), tossing Cheeto flavored gum out the window:

Britney pondering the deep questions of life, such as "paper or plastic":

It’s not surprising that she didn’t pay them, as look how much multi-tasking she has the new hunky bodyguard doing - bodyguarding (is that a word), nannying (is that a word) and personal shopping. It is clear she takes people’s labor for granted, like their sole existence on the planet is to serve her as some sort of princess, which she is not, while she and K-Fed spend money like water on themselves.   

Speaking of the Federrific one:

K-Fed Dissed By Singer Ne-yo 

"I don't know the guy, but I know people that know him and he seems to be a guy who caught a break. He's a bit of a freeloader. I've done one session for her, but now she's pregnant it may be put on hold for a while. I'm not allowed to talk about her sound though, her people want it kept under wraps." - Handbag.com 

Oh no he didn’t. Wow @ the “caught a break” line. He just put it out there didn’t, he. He said what many others are thinking.  

Considering he’s done work for Spears, Ne-yo should be more concerned that his check clears (LOL). See bodyguard segment above for further reference.    

(below) Kevin fronts the "Save The Penny" campaign. Why? it costs more to make than its monetary value. That's just bad economics:

(above) K-Fed illustrates how much money Britney will have at the current rate they're going.

Angelina Spears Follow Up

A follow up on last month's Column regarding Britney trying to morph into Angelina Jolie. A magazine has expounded on that in great detail this month, pretty much confirming it:

Britney Overexposed

“How Can We Love Britney Spears If She Won’t Go Away? Spears, just a shout away from an eternity in trailer park heaven, rollers in her hair and a caffeinated substance down her gullet on a regular basis, did have an innocent start. The Mickey Mouse Club will do that to a person. Create the illusion of chaste, harmless purity, and nobody will get hurt. 

The problem with “nakedness” in the game plan of a fading pop tart trying to map out the next phase in her career and life is that she will not understand it on an abstract, symbolic level. The nude pregnant cover photo of Spears on the latest “Harper’s Bazaar,” like Demi Moore over a decade ago on the cover of “Vanity Fair,” certainly is both provocative and beautiful. 

Unfortunately, it is also empty. Make-up artists, hair stylists, and Photo Shop magicians have certainly done their job with this photo shoot.” – National Ledger 

Britney Overexposed Some More  

Don't let the cameras bother you, Britney, just dig away:

“I do not understand the current ongoing Britney Spears fascination. I do not understand why the deathly uninteresting ball of neon pink bubblegum can appear with Matt Lauer looking like ten miles of silly ditzy pregnant whi*e trash, all skanky roots and garish makeup and a truly horrible choice in denim miniskirts and the dumbest answers to the easiest softball questions since Tom Cruise revealed his psychotic Xenu persona on Oprah, and yet still appear on the cover of moderately reputable fashion magazines.  

I'm looking at you, Bazaar…Smiling that vacant, I-like-to-stare-at-bunnies smile, like she has no idea, either, what the hell she's doing there. 

So then. I do not get it. BS has turned from moderately interesting white trash pop diva with a cute n' highly marketable Madonna/whore complex, into... what, exactly? Why is she still on magazine covers? Why is anyone interested? What am I missing? Am I just not drunk enough? Where is my mallet?” - San Francisco Chronicle 

She’s pleaded for privacy, but refuses to leave the limelight. She’s always calling new interviews and hamming it up for the paparazzi. She clearly loves the attention, but her name has changed for the worst. This isn’t the good kind of publicity. It’s the bad one.     

Britney Stunned Her “Hill Billy” Chic Look Didn't Go Over Well 

Britney scaring America on Dateline NBC - she even scared Steven King of all people, who wrote an article about the episode out of sheer shock, as did Donald Trump.

It’s really evident that from her early teens all she was taught to do is dance, wear skimpy clothes, behave like a lolita and lip-sync. It made the family money and questionably so. She was taught to be a lip-syncing pop star and not much else. Now functioning in the real world and as a parent is seriously throwing her for a loop - it's throwing the baby too - literally...in the air. She is clearly disconnected from reality:   

“Pregnant pop star Britney Spears was so devastated by the negative reaction she received after her appearance on news show "Dateline," she chopped off all her hair and dyed it black to help her image. The singer received a barrage of criticism for appearing on the show in a sheer, low-cut top, denim mini-skirt and flip-flops earlier this month. 

She reportedly insisted on doing her own hair and makeup for the interview and was slammed for appearing "disheveled" with the New York Post reporting that fans called her hair a "rat's nest." 

A source tells Us Weekly after the interview, "She felt terrible. She pulled out her extensions and bought a bottle of dark hair dye. She didn't understand her image problem until the negative feedback about Dateline." – Star Pulse 

Site Bets “On How Bad A Mom Britney Will Be” 

Boy her PR has taken quite a dip. A gambling site is offering odds you can bet on of how bad a mom Britney will be.  

While I do not endorse gambling, regarding Britney, oh, how the pseudo-mighty have fallen. Cause when the gamblers are taking odds on you failing, you know you’ve messed up.  

“Bet on how bad of a mother Britney Spears will be. How Will Britney Spears endanger her children next before 12/31/07? 

This is one of my favorite props of all time. It assumes two key things in this issue. First, that Britney Spears regularly endangers her child’s life. Second, that she will continue to do so. It’s not a matter of if, but a matter of when and how. That is simply great. We all know Britney’s a bad mother, but now we can wager on just how bad she will be. 

The smart money would be with K-Fed babysitting, as he’d probably accidentally start caring for a stuffed animal that bears a vague resemblance to a polar bear instead of watching the kid. Still, I can’t help but be intrigued at the Speed Boat prop. I’m a gambler, I like to take chances on things, and anytime a Speed Boat is involved, we all win.” - TOW News 

And the good bad publicity continues…  

“And the Lizzie for ‘Most Fascinating and/or Anticipated Celebrity Train Wreck of the Year’ goes to...Britney Spears.” 

“In the past 12 months, Britney Spears has managed to go from pop royalty to train wreck. To add a little perspective and underscore the magnitude of Britney's achievement, keep in mind that it took Michael Jackson at least a decade to achieve the same metamorphosis. 

Where once we abashedly watched as Britney flouted such conventions as taste, age appropriateness and sexuality, we now stare horrified as she calls her parenting skills, marital state and sanity into question. Well done, Brit! 

In a break with Celebritology Honors tradition, I'd like to take this opportunity to offer Britney a little advice that will (hopefully) keep her far from this category next year:  

Get out of the public eye until at least 2007, stop posting goofy poetry to your Web site, raise your children and enjoy their first years. If K-Fed's doing you wrong kick him to the curb, ease up on the Frappacinos and treat your body right -- all of the above will pay off both physically and mentally, preparing you to mount an odds-defying comeback in a couple of years. In short: strong Britney! – Washington Post 

You know your career is in trouble when the press and public are begging you to leave the limelight. It’s a sentiment reiterated all over the internet by the product buying public.  

...And speaking of someone who the public is really begging to leave the limelight, even more than Britney...

CELEBRITY Paris Hilton

Photo and caption from Yay Sports

And in prostitution news, Paris Hilton redid her criminal copyright infringing video "Stars Are Deaf Blind"…and it still stinks. The bashing she got from all corners of the internet over that video was too much for the flamingoed floozy to bare.

It’s funny, in her self-sparked rivalry with Nicole Richie, who she says she is better than, because nobody cares about Nicole according to Paris (this will come as a shock to her family, who by all appearances care about her) - Richie actually can sing and is far more believable as an artist than Paris.  

The internet blogs have joined forces to give Paris' CD the thumbs down and the we're-not-buying-you-face, as in turn it down:

Pic caption from PITNB

Hilton is not believable as an artist at all. In her video she looks like a porn star and her singing is thoroughly computerized – that an artist does not make. After the critical and verbal flogging she received last month from this site and others that I kindly posted on here for the not so smart Hilton and Warner Bros to read (I know you all frequent this site - according to the stats) they redid the video, but audiences still hate her:

"Do-over! Paris Hilton Remakes her Music Video

Paris Hilton just shot another video for her single, Stars Are Blind. This one has a "concept" and is not just frolicking on the beach. Though, um, there's still tons of that. 

Basically it's even more of a *** up than the first one - now its a mash of the gross PDA on the beach that we saw in the first music video interspersed with random photo shoots of Paris on said beach - (some that are vaguely, disturbingly S&M). It makes no sense! Is she playfully cavorting on the beach or is she doing a some strange fetish shoot? With Paris, I guess the one is the other. 

Look out for the end where a photo shoot turns naughty and the camera moves to the bedroom, which of course directly recalls her other famous video. The girl has NO shame! Actually, I bet she thinks it's clever and funny. Which it would be if clever meant stupid and funny meant lame." - varsity.co.nz 

More, um, public critiquing of clips and leaked materials from her so called CD featured later in the Column.

And don't forget to boycott her CD that comes out in August 2006 for she and Warner Bros criminally ripping off my copyrighted work for that trash, as was done with ringleader and perpetual thief Madonna click here for more info.

Paris Smoking Weed In Public Again

What is this, like the 3rd time she's been seen smoking weed in public. Kids at home, don't try this, as only celebrities are allowed to break the law and get away with it. You do this and you will go to jail. From TMZ this month:

Paid To Prostitute 

"If you see pictures of me out I'm being paid. When I turn up at an event it is work.” – Paris Hilton

So when you go out to clubs, publicly get drunk, grind on some random man, dance like a whore and deliberately flash people via poorly worn outfits that you strategically like to lift up for the cameras (gross) – you're working, then? That’s usually called being a stripper or prostitute, but if you say so Paris.  

Paris Says "Eat Carbs" 

"Enjoy life, eat carbs at night if you want. You can always dance the calories off. I'm always on the go and that burns plenty of calories. I'm really lucky that I have a naturally good figure." 

According to singer Pink you puke "the calories off."

Paris Karma?

The fashion police ought to lock you up for life for that get up - and have the nerve to criticize other people's clothes:

"God gives you good karma if you work hard and play nice.” You’re religious? “Yes, Catholic.” Do you keep a Bible by your bed? “No.” Just a camcorder? At this, the smart blonde flicks her hair and deadpans, “Whatever, man. At least I’ll always be remembered.” - The Times UK

Oh Paris, queen of the valley girls, God does not give karma, as that's is not a Christian term.

And considering the amount of relationships you've broken up, homes you've broken up, people you've stepped on and threatened (you know - threatening to put a hit on the promoter who told your ex-boyfriend you have herpes and trying to get your then boyfriend's ex-girlfriend Greek heiress with more money than you (is it just me or are Greek people really rich) thrown out of a club (which they refused) and going up to her, tapping her on the shoulder and "whispering in her ear ‘you’re a ******g b**** and I’m going to destroy you", then proceeding to plant a defamatory, nasty story in the press about her that you made up out of your feeble-mindedness, about her stealing a $4,000,000 necklace off your flamingo-esque neck and threatening you, which never happened - you should be concerned about your "karma." I said that in one breath (and apparently in one long run on sentence).

"Always be remembered"? Based on reports her mother was very loose (like mother like daughter) and married well (into the Hilton family), hence Paris, but she thinks she is better than everyone else. Hardy royal lineage.

What have you done that is noteworthy (porn doesn't count). There have been people like you in the past. Remember them? Ah, you don't do you. Point proven. Actually accomplish something of value - those are the people who are remembered.

“It's Official: Paris Hilton Most Over-Hyped Celeb”

Paris receives an award befitting her status:  

“We can safely declare the winners of the inaugural edition of the annual Celebritology Honors (aka The Lizzies). Celebrity Most Likely to be Insignificant if it Weren't for the Paparazzi and Celebrity Tabloids/Blogs…And the Lizzie goes to... Paris Hilton. 

Paris couldn't be here to accept this award so I'll just congratulate her on her talent for staying in the news while doing approximately nothing. The unprecedented interest in her social life, catfights with equally the vapid Nicole Richie and Lindsay Lohan and a string of romances with Greek shipping heirs have transformed this scion of a hotel fortune into tabloid gold. Over the next year we'll be taking bets watching to see whether Paris parlays her "Simple Life" into a lucrative singing career or, like, continues to trade on her ability to create a void and still trail hordes of breathless paparazzo in her wake.” - Reuters 

And the awards just keep rolling in:

"Most Inane Comment, Demonstrating Complete Self-Absorption and Cluelessness” 

The nominees:

- Britney Spears on driving with infant Sean Preston on her lap: "I can't go anywhere without someone judging me. You know. I did it with my dad. I'd sit on his lap and I'd drive. We're country."

- Kevin Federline on child rearing: "My kids are going to work at Taco Bell, da**it."

- Paris Hilton on cigarettes: "Smoking is so sexy. It's like so cool how you all smoke everywhere in the U.K."

- Tom Cruise jokes about Scientology births and the then-anticipated birth of his child with Katie Holmes: "I thought that would be good. Very nutritious. I'm going to eat the cord and the placenta right there." 

And the Lizzie goes to... Paris Hilton. 

Speaking of a void, Paris has done it again, winning two out of three of this year's awards... this one for opening her mouth and calling one of the leading causes of death -- to both smokers and those around them -- "sexy."  

But maybe Paris shouldn't be blamed for this one. After all, Hollywood has long glorified the cigarette as accessory to the bold and beautiful and she should not suffer for succumbing to product placement. Let's stop blaming her and just keep her out of R-rated movies, okay? (To clarify: I mean out of movie theaters because if I had meant to imply that she be kept away from the business end of a film camera, I'd have said "X-rated movies," right?) 

Anyway, it's not as if she said: "Wal-Mart? Do they make walls there?" or "All British people have plain names, and that works pretty well over there," or even "I don't want to be known as the granddaughter of the Hiltons. I want to be known as Paris." 

Actually, she did." – Washington Post 

Singer Butch Walker Slams Paris Hilton 

Butch "So At Last" Walker

“In other words, he won't be working with Paris Hilton anytime soon. In fact, Walker holds special contempt for that star's entry into the music biz. "I think she's useless," he says. "I grew up poor and worked so hard to get where I am. And then somebody comes along who's just bored at how rich they are and they feel they have to do something. It's pompous and sad." – Kansas City

Paris Commissioned A Hack?

Paris is being accused of commissioning the hack of actress Lindsay Lohan’s Blackberry. Considering she is in the Kabbalah cult with Madonna, who've hacked other people's computers via a commissioned hacker, with said cult having invaded other people's privacy in cases that are on record, one has to wonder about this story:

"Paris Hilton has hit out at reports she hacked into Lindsay Lohan's BlackBerry and sent offensive messages to her friends from it. 

Lindsay Lohan's spokeswoman explains that the perpetrator sent "disgusting and very mean messages" that everyone thought were coming from Lindsay - and that her lawyers are now looking into it.

Some people think Paris may have been involved because the wording of the messages sounds very familiar but the heiress' representative says: "As for any suggestion that Paris would have anything to do with this, that is silly, untrue and unfortunate." - The Irish Examiner

Paris Habitually Breaking The Law

"Paris Hilton Still Has a License - Paris Hilton, a notorious police magnet had a run in early Wednesday morning with the Los Angeles County Sheriff's Department reports TMZ… 

TMZ cameraman Josh Levine spotted Paris' Range Rover at 1:50 a.m. Wednesday on Sunset Blvd. in West Hollywood. Levine noticed that a patrol car was following her vehicle -- which was moving quite slow -- for a block with it's emergency lights off. Then the flashing red lights lit up the street and, according to Levine, "Paris booked it."

Levine ran for three blocks, then turned up a side street where he saw the patrol officer and Paris' vehicle. The officer did not ticket Hilton and allowed her to leave.

Deputy Rudy Acevedo says Hilton was driving by Privilege, a nightclub, and began slowing down, stopping, slowing down and stopping again in traffic. Acevedo says Hilton did speed up when he turned on his emergency lights, but a block later he directed her on his loudspeaker to turn right, and she did.

Last month, Paris Hilton was caught parking in a disabled bay. The 'House of Wax' star infuriated residents in the exclusive Los Angeles apartment complex where her boyfriend, American football player Matt Leinart, lives by repeatedly leaving her car in the same spot.

Paris' spokesman, Elliot Mintz, told America's New York Post newspaper: "I find the reports surprising." Just days after, Hilton hit a parked car causing damage, then left without leaving a note -- allegedly a violation of California law, and it's all on video.

After loading her shopping bags into the trunk of her Range Rover, Hilton says good-bye to Kardashian and starts to back out of the parking spot without her seat belt on -- another violation of law.  

Hilton checks her mirrors and looks around, but apparently doesn't notice the parked Honda Civic behind her and slams into the bumper, causing damage to both vehicles.

Hilton then exits the public parking structure without leaving a note with her contact information, which is a misdemeanor under California law, punishable by as much as six months in jail.  

This latest incident is just another in a series of Hilton-related car mishaps." – The Bosh 

You Guys Are Hurting Paris' Feelings 

She treats people very badly, goes around issuing death threats, stealing, breaking up relationships, egged on her drunk friend  to severely disparage another woman's vagina while the cameras rolled (Lindsay Lohan) - and has the nerve to ask for sympathy. You are the epitome of having no class, no breeding, no sensitivity or compassion.

I'm guessing your parents didn't send you to finishing school. You are proof of the adage money can't buy class.

Paris' plea was staged to the public to stop bashing her was well received...in the wrong way, in that they are really going after her now more than ever on the internet (bad PR move). They see her doing cruel things to others and believe she doesn't deserve sympathy. The gloves came off. Some of these are quite profound, like #16. Some feedback from the internet:

1. She's an icon.....right? In her own mind. Can't stand the ***** and don't care if her poor little feelings get hurt. Maybe she will take all the hints and go away. Tired of her.....so tired. Don't like her acting, her singing or her porn. What does she have to offer? And, who cares??????? Posted at 10:39AM on Jul 20th 2006 by lyn

2. I think that some things that are said about Paris are a lil harsh but I also think in a way that she put herself in the limelight to be talked about. Posted at 10:41AM on Jul 20th 2006 by Melissa/Philadelphia, PA

3. Oh please Paris grow up- you are hurt by our comments? Why do you make comments that you are like Marilyn Monroe? GROW UP! Posted at 10:41AM on Jul 20th 2006 by Aileen

4. Hey Paris, If you weren't such a waste of media, ugly, & stupid, maybe people wouldn't dislike you so much. There are lots of rich, attractive, decent people in the world that would bump your rump off the totem pole if they were arrogant enough to hire a PR machine. P*** off and do something worthwhile with your money, Skank. Posted at 10:42AM on Jul 20th 2006 by Hill

5. Maybe you should stop making ridiculous comments such as comparing yourself to Marilyn Monroe or Princess Di. Your never-ending quest for publicity despite your complete lack of contributing anything meaningful to the world might require a rethink as well? You are the definition of empty-headed American princess. You would be nothing without the money you won in the lucky sperm club. Surely even you must see this! Go away for a year, do something meaningful, and then we'll talk. Until then you're still a bimbo slut in most peoples eyes! BTW... Like you really give a ***** about what people think unless they have more money than you. Then you're all over it.....Posted at 10:43AM on Jul 20th 2006 by racer

6. I'm sorry but I do not feel sorry for Paris. Oh, poor little rich girl. Everyone is picking on her. Well, Paris, do you ever consider any one else's feelings? because it seems to me that you are all about yourself. Remember, what goes around comes around. Posted at 10:45AM on Jul 20th 2006 by Drae

7. Gee, so showing your *** and ***** in public shouldn't illicit comments? You're a moron girl, a waste of space. Posted at 10:47AM on Jul 20th 2006 by justcallme*****

8. Oh Paris....you might be getting good at your acting after all. You shoulda never told us this hurts...BECAUSE IT'S ON NOW *****!!! You can not be any faker. Maybe...MAYBE!!! if you do something good with your life like actually go overseas and see how ****** up the world really is ...or better yet, go to the poor places in the US and invest your money in better things than yourself....you are nothing but a talent-less rich kid surrounded by people that are using you...think about it...how many friends do you REALLY think you have? Why don't you work for a change...you make fun of Lindsay Lohan and really she has way more respect from people than what they have for you. She's gone thru true hardship and has worked her *** off. Sure, she's not worth as much monetarily but every penny she has she's earned it...can you say that about yourself...you are nothing but a publicity whore. We all hate you. Posted at 10:48AM on Jul 20th 2006 by Luly

9. Hey Paris, you are so rude to anyone who crosses you. Shut up and go away. Maybe to finishing school. So you are rich. Why don't you donate your time to helping people who don't have what you have. Remember you and Brandon calling Lindsay horrible names. Karma is a wonderful thing. Oh, and I finally saw your dvd. "A Night in Paris". Puke. You are such a waste of life. Posted at 10:48AM on Jul 20th 2006 by Annie

10. Plain and simple, Paris lies. Example: She said she doesn't dance on top of tables but there are pics to prove it. She should just keep her mouth shut. People who lie are very warped. Posted at 10:49AM on Jul 20th 2006 by Kim

11. I'm most surprised that she even knows what the word, "sadistic" means. She probably had to have someone spell it for her. Get out of the spotlight you no-talent media whore and people will quit complaining about you. Posted at 10:49AM on Jul 20th 2006 by Rachel

12. Yeah Ok Paris..... Do you think it hurt Lindsay's feelings while you were whispering things In Brandon Davis ear when he went off on her?? Do you think we don't know that you were telling him things to say?? Oh, But oh yeah.... you weren't saying them OUT LOUD!!! WHATEVER.... LIAR LIAR LIAR Posted at 10:51AM on Jul 20th 2006 by Lilly

13. Cry me a river p*** me a stream...If she wants people to look at her normally she needs to stop being a drunk skanky h*...and please stop torturing me with your "music" Posted at 10:51AM on Jul 20th 2006 by florida girl

14. Hey Paris, Buy a backone with all the money you make. You are a slut, deal with it. Posted at 10:55AM on Jul 20th 2006 by Lisa

15. Boo-hoo............are we supposed to feel bad for this girl? Posted at 10:55AM on Jul 20th 2006 by Pink Sherbert

16. You get what you ask for. I think the arrogance and better than everyone persona is aggravating. No one feels sorry for a poor little rich girl who has every opportunity in the world to do something great, but instead p***es it away on stupid material things and then expects people to feel sorry for her? It's petty high school behavior. Grow up and take a look at the big world, not just the world from a Hilton hotel room. Posted at 10:55AM on Jul 20th 2006 by melissa

17. Why the **** is Paris reading TMZ posts. If I was her I wouldn't have the time. Doesn't anyone think that it is strange? I think people who don't like her just tell her about it. She really needs to get out of the public eye and just live her life or she will continue to get trashed by people. If it bothered her that much she wouldn't make herself a spectacle. Posted at 10:56AM on Jul 20th 2006 by wendi

18. Wow...you have feelings...o.k. Paris explain the cheap shots towards Lindsay Lohan. You were taped walking down the street by TMZ and others with another rich brat talking about Ms. Lohan when she's never uttered one negative thing about you...she's got better things on her mind. You can't expect people to feel sorry for you when you're seen on TV and in magazines trotting from one part of the world to the next, when the rest of us are working our ***** off just to keep a roof over our heads...your feelings were hurt.....big deal...go on another vacation. Posted at 10:56AM on Jul 20th 2006 by Louis

19. Sounds like somebody can dish it out, but can't take it....wah wah wah.....Posted at 10:57AM on Jul 20th 2006 by stellar one

28. She's still a h*sebag. I love the human condom comment - so dead on. If you don't like the negative comments-don't go online. They're everywhere. Posted at 10:59AM on Jul 20th 2006 by Jill

29. She says some of the most unwarranted things about others and when others say things about he, she can't take it. Grow up! You gotta take the good with the bad...Posted at 11:00AM on Jul 20th 2006 by SoSick&Tired

30. Boo-hoo hoo. Poor little Paris. Posted at 11:00AM on Jul 20th 2006 by Ginger - From TMZ

Paris The New "Cyndi Lauper And Debbie Harry"? – Apparently The Public Disagrees

"She has a certain tone that's reminiscent of Cyndi Lauper and Blondie," Storch told Billboard in April of Hilton's sound. "The album doesn't have one particular sound. It's just good music; a combination of R&B, hip-hop and pop. – Billboard

Some feedback from Oh No They Didn't:

31. LOL Blondie and Cyndi Lauper. They wish. That behind the scenes thing should be... interesting. Of course it's high on the charts, that ***** just released her "FEEL SO BAD FOR ME!!" video to get all our sympathy and more of our money when we buy her ***** album. She ain't gettin a dollar outta my pocket. [info]evil_heiress 2006-07-22 04:47 am UTC (link)

32. lol - [info]reverberates - 2006-07-22 04:47 am UTC (link)

34. When will this dumb h* learn to promote her songs? You can't just throw your single out there without promoting it! She's gotta sing it live. [info]aaameeting 2006-07-22 04:49 am UTC (link)

35. She is not even Kylie. - [info]freeko 2006-07-22 04:51 am UTC (link)          

36. Well obviously. The first time I heard 'Stars Are Blind' I thought it was 'The Tide Is High'. [info]inthis__skiin 2006-07-22 04:55 am UTC (link)

37. me too! and I went back to that whole she was sound like Blondie it. But people were saying she sounded like Gwen and I was like WHAT She and screechin' TicK TOCk Tick TOCK or spelling o-u-t fruit...[info]crazyfire 2006-07-22 05:41 am UTC (link          

38. lol. Exactly. My *** she sounds like Gwen. The background music sounds almost identical to 'The Tide is High'. That's Blondie all the way, baby. Gwen...that makes me L0L. [info]inthis__skiin 2006-07-22 06:39 am UTC (link)

Think about it. If someone you dont know came up to you on the street and gave you the Fart in a Mitten spiel, would you laugh it off because it's so random to the point of ridiculousness, or would you cry? Would you even get it!? I'm still tryin to figure out what it means. Who farts in a mitten and why??? But I digress. My 2cents. [info]havesomecocoa 2006-07-22 11:59 am UTC (link)

66. I actually didn't watch her face as he read the insults to her, so I don't know, but her repeated response, "It hurts, it hurt my feelings, it hurt my feelings." seemed . . . hm. If it WAS scripted, she had a really bad writer.

Oh, and it's probably midden, slag in Scotland for anything that's a mess, or, outhouse. Fart in a midden is a saying, but it's akin to drop of water in the ocean, so I don't think the interviewer or original poster knew what they were repeating. XD

And I don't think it was the 'fart in the midden' thing that even got to her, if at all. It was after that, he went on with, you just want her gone, but she won't leave! or the like. Harsh.[info]simmysim 2006-07-22 12:07 pm UTC (link)

67. oh please, this girl is not going to get any sympathy from me. all this she brings on herself. [info]tenners 2006-07-22 03:35 am UTC (link)

68. well maybe if she would stop flashing her vagina just to get some camera attention, those things wouldnt be said about her. she shouldve cried a little, then maybe i wouldve felt sorry for her. [info]heykates 2006-07-22 03:36 am UTC (link)

69. she totally didn't know what endured meant. [info]justlikeneon 2006-07-22 03:36 am UTC (link)

70. Promiscuous and Sadistic...what other million-dollar words did she use?! I'm shocked. Maybe even impressed? I love how serious that interview was supposed to be and then the guy had to just say, "fart in a mitten". I LOLed like mad!![info]trixx_r4_kidz 2006-07-22 03:40 am UTC (link)

71. No sympathy at all. [info]countincrows 2006-07-22 03:43 am UTC (link)

72. I don't think Paris is as stupid as her so called 'image' makes her seems. However, I do believe if you put her out in the real world and make her see what us down here see going on, then she wouldn't last a week. And don't say she does with the Simple Life, because like this interview, that is staged.[info]super_rose 2006-07-22 03:43 am UTC (link)

73. haha was anyone else laughing when he was reading the comments? ' i wish you would just die you damn slut' HAHA [info]externalmusic 2006-07-22 03:48 am UTC (link)

74. Well, people don't say those things for the hell of it. Comments on her are based on how she presents herself to the general public. You must admit, she loves being in the spotlight. Though I will agree that those comments were too harsh. But she does seem very shallow and annoying and unworthy of recognition. People react to the image she has chosen to portray, and she needs to realize this. Anyway, she seemed well coached. Maybe a little too well coached...[info]ilihyceniwast 2006-07-22 03:50 am UTC (link)

75. Still insipid and trashy. [info]extrafinesugar 2006-07-22 03:50 am UTC (link)

76. If she thinks the comments on TMZ about her are bad, she had better never venture on over to this site. Our posts would have her on the window ledge of a building.[info]patty_a_c 2006-07-22 03:29 am UTC (link)

77. i still hate her. [info]sevenblocks 2006-07-22 03:51 am UTC (link)

78. I don't hate Paris, but she just comes off as so 2 dimensional. Her output as a celebrity is just not stimulating to me. It's just boring to sit through an interview with her. She has no interesting insight on music or acting or anything.[info] mrmidwest 2006-07-22 03:51 am UTC (link)

79. "It hurts blah blah blah It really hurts blah blah blah blah IT REALLY HURTS." What hurts is how stage that is. You know that old guy was like say sadistic it'll make you sound smart. She probably said "But what does that mean?" I still say she really talks like a man. [info]nahimanatane 2006-07-22 03:30 am UTC (link)

80. for those of you feeling sorry for her: this is the same girl who sat there giggling like a 10-year-old while some fat, greasy pile of **** ripped another girl to shreds. I don't like Lindsay Lohan, but for Paris to sit there and say that it "hurts", she should practice what she preaches. [info]kerrence 2006-07-22 03:32 am UTC (link)

81. so it's okay to rip someone you know. but if someone you don't know thinks you're awful based on your public image, it's wrong? that's a stupid double standard. don't portray yourself as something you don't want people to think you are. and like I said, death comments are way out of line, I agree.[info]kerrence 2006-07-22 03:39 am UTC (link)    

82. yeah laughing and holding up your phone so others can hear your idiot friend's stupid tirade about a former friend is as classy as it gets. :\ [info]kerrence 2006-07-22 03:44 am UTC (link)

83. who was that guy anyway? he said something stupid like "she's poor .. she only has 7 million dollars.. im disgusted". he's a loser.[info]sick_beatzzz 2006-07-22 04:03 am UTC (link)

84. WHAT A SET UP! LOL, anyone who falls for her **** needs to be punched. [info]prisonero 2006-07-22 03:16 am UTC (link)

85. Haha well how do YOU think she feels about people saying that ?! It seems likely the "spontaneous" interview was a setup, but do you really think she's PRETENDING to be upset??? Who ENJOYS being called a human condom? She IS a dumb ***** but that doesn't make her immune to that kind of abuse...[info]thisisfliss 2006-07-22 10:17 am UTC (link)

86. I still can't get over some of these comments. I mean, how OBVIOUS is it that the interview was staged?? I'm sorry, but it's too funny![info]prisonero 2006-07-22 03:29 am UTC (link)     

87. And the rivers shall run with blood...Look! Do I see an airbound swine? (yeah, I know what you mean.)[info] rinakshi 2006-07-22 04:00 am UTC (link

88. Yeah seriously, actually seeing her react to the things people always say about her made me feel so bad. What a harsh reality check; I bet she always assumed the public would love her. :(

89. Hopefully she's upset enough to get out of the spotlight so people will stop abusing her? I feel sorry for her as a person but Paris Hilton as a celebrity/product still needs to disappear...[info]thisisfliss 2006-07-22 10:13 am UTC (link)

90. SAME HERE!! weirdddd[info]soundofgoodbye_2006-07-22 10:24 am UTC (link)

91. That was so staged I actually thought it was a parody. To those of you who bought that: suckas! [info] wartimechocolat 2006-07-22 03:21 am UTC (link)

92. At least she isn't using that baby voice.[info]janey2006-07-22 03:13 am UTC (link)

93 no, she's still using it. her real voice is still alot deeper then that. [info]myteesharp 2006-07-22 04:23 am UTC (link)

94. i heard from a shrink once and read that women who use baby voices have most likely experienced childhood sexual abuse. [info]radioface 2006-07-22 06:59 am UTC (link)

95. I don't know WHAT IT IS but in this clip she reminds me of the Childlike Empress from The Neverending Story. Doesn't look like her but just the way she's acting.[info]yesternight 2006-07-22 03:14 am UTC (link)

96. You're right![info]amyoung 2006-07-22 04:01 am UTC (link)

97. ... you're right. I see it.[info]thefooliscool 2006-07-22 04:02 am UTC (link)

98. that seems SO STAGED.[info]phamos818 2006-07-22 03:14 am UTC (link)

99. I know! It sounds like she had that speech prepared. [info]havesomecocoa 2006-07-22 03:17 am UTC (link)

100. I hardly call that a speech..how unarticulate..[info]withinthemiles 2006-07-22 04:22 am UTC (link)

101. That's what I thought. [info]minyafalas 2006-07-22 03:23 am UTC (link)

102. I totally agree. It was very obvious that Elliott was acting. How many people does the guy represent?![info]amelia_heinle 2006-07-22 03:50 am UTC (link)

103. iawtc. Really from the beginning with that guy taking her aside in the beginning to the camera already being set. Completely prepared. And she did use the baby voice a little at the end when she started to promote her music. [info]greendaizey 2006-07-22 03:51 am UTC (link)           

104. How can you say that? That just like.. hurts my feelings..[info]demonologue 2006-07-22 04:44 am UTC (link)

105. FAVORITE CARTOON SHOW EVER.[info]twinkie_2006-07-22 07:35 am UTC (link)

106. staged, staged, staged and staged. Asking her about comments on TMZ!?!? Publicity stunt for both of them and people are so naive they fall for it.  when will her 'fame' end? *sigh*[info]lovenoelg2006-07-22 03:15 am UTC (link)

107. Cry me a river. [info]havesomecocoa 2006-07-22 03:16 am UTC (link)

CELEBRITY Paris' Rival Lindsay Lohan Slammed By Film Studio CEO

Flirting with the director, who is old enough to be your grandfather, won't help you now. Lohan and an unoriginal Garry Marshall:

Head of Morgan Creek Films let Lohan have it for her partying that has cost them hundreds of thousand of dollars when she shows up late for work after partying all night or just doesn't show up at all:

Lohan Slammed By Actor

"Hustle and Flow star DJ Qualls has told the paparazzi that Lindsay Loahn, 'is not kind. I will say that. She’s just not nice, not nice, she’s not a nice girl. She has two movies left, that’s all I’m saying.” He refused to elaborate any further on his comments." - Fametastic

A Survey About Lohan's Partying

Does Lohan party too much?
Considering she is under age, yes - 62%
No, she is doing what any other kid her age would - 18%
No, I want to see her in rehab before 21 - 20% - Entertainmentwise

Some internet feedback from Entertainmentwise:

I’m amazed the clubs that allow Lohan to drink don’t have their liquor licenses yanked. I know celebrity has its privileges, but her crew seems headed for a head on collision in cars. Partying hard and often is russian roulette: eventually something really bad happens. Ask Mel Gibson or Hassle-off. It takes work to mess up at Wimbledon. Duh........
- RENEGABE , WASHINGTON, DC

Lindsay’s partying wouldn’t be so bad if she didn’t do it every night. Although I don’t think dancing on tables drunk is too cool! Most people who drink in clubs everyday are alcoholics and think they’re not because they’re drinking in a club instead of at home.
- STACEY, SEATTLE

Lohan Dumped By UK Label

And there's more bad news for Lohan - she's been fired by her UK record label. It seems they spent money on her CD and she didn't show up to promote it. Not a good idea, as the UK is a strong music market.

Her excessive partying that her mother publicly excused is costing her a lot. Maybe it's time to have a talk with your daughter about the partying, insobriety and cult involvement for her career's sake and that of her well being (not in that order), as she is headed for punchlineville, population many a faded star who made the same mistakes.

CELEBRITY Where's Waldo Suri

Katie Holmes (pre-Tom Cruise, sans the brainwashed face)

MUSIC PETA Punks Beyonce

Now I know this is a little late, but better late than never. Like I said before in this Column, I’m no Beyonce fan, for said singer saying she is a Christian and basically living like hell in the public eye. But PETA ambushing her at a restaurant was in bad taste, like spoiled meat (ok, bad joke).     

PETA was able to ambush her in a restaurant by outbidding everyone else at a Music Cares Charity Auction for a dinner with her. 

Not to insult PETA, as there are members of PETA who seem nice, like Pam Anderson and John McEnroe (try to sell a tennis umpire on that one - joking), but people have the right to wear fur and eat meat without being maligned for it.

PETA have been targeting her and others, in person and over the internet (some statements left on the net have been defamatory and libelous) and it has clearly crossed the line into stalking and harassment, which is inappropriate.

As I wrote previously in this column, there are many products made from animals such as: 

• Weaves (animal rights groups just lost many black women with that one)

• Toupees (animal rights groups just lost countless men in Hollywood with that one)

• Cosmetic surgery fillers (animal rights groups just lost countless women in Hollywood with that one)

• Computers (animal rights groups just lost me with that one)

• Roads (well, unless you can naturally fly or walk on grass all the time...)

• Cosmetics: make up, make up brushes, lotions

• Tires

• Brake fluid

• Several Soaps

• Furniture, Rugs

• Magazines

• Clothes

• Glue on postage stamps in all countries

• Instrument parts (strings, drum heads)

• Toys, crayons

• AIDS and Cancer research

• Vaccines

• Pesticides

• Gelatin

• Bubble Gum

• Beer

• And of course, let's not forget...meat (ok, bad joke)

Therefore, we have to keep things in perspective. I think animals are beautiful and I do not agree with cruelty to them, but they have become a big part of the way society functions in what they are used to make, from the roads we use to the computers we type on.  

My mom brought up a very interesting point the other day. She said, "What about the food chain?" When she said that at first I didn't get what she meant and wondered, "Is it time to put you on medication" (I was kidding when I thought that). Then it dawned on me what she meant (hey, it's her fault. She doesn't like to elaborate her points, like I can read her mind).  

What she meant was animals eat other animals, hence the food chain. Animal rights groups don't interfere with that.  – May 2005 Sound Off Column 

Therefore, it’s hard to avoid. Each person has the right to champion their legal causes (legal meaning i.e. not weed) but people also have the right to eat meat and wear fur, as that is legal as well.

The Beyonce ambush was a bit ill-advised, especially since the dinner was something done for charity and as many entertainers will testify,  you meet so many people, some of them not balanced, it has to be a bit disconcerting and alarming at first that the questioning take such a turn and a DVD player is whipped out with graphic imagery. That’s a bit inconsiderate under the circumstances and screams stalking.  

TV The View - Star Jones v. Barbara Walters

Star Jones	Barbara Walters

"The View" fighting has gotten ugly. While I have seen maybe 3 episodes of the show, I really don't understand why people who were seemingly friends, with emphasis on seemingly, were so hypocritical with each other.

Proving once again that in Hollywood there is no loyalty, only self-interest, Star Jones was let go from the view after being told her job was secure.

Star learned who her real friends are. Sometimes God will allow things like that to show you who's who.

Some blame it on Rosie O'Donnell, who has been announced as a new addition to the show. I do not think she will make a good addition to The View at all, as Rosie is abrasive (Ellen's not abrasive, and before you try to pull the gay card - don't go there, I'll pull the black card - oh what, you think you're the only one who can pull cards).

This was a very bad transition made awkward by Rosie being a troublemaker and instigator talking trash about Star in the press - for no reason at all. Let's hope you don't alienate black viewers, because as a black person, I don't like how this woman was treated by an all white show.

Say what you will about Star being a "bridezilla" as I have read, that level of hypocrisy and backbiting towards her is not cute. At least she doesn't have the tact of godzilla -Aisha looks at Rosie-. 

FILM Superman or Supergay

Gayman Superman cost Warner “We Steal Stuff” Bros. $300,000,000 to make, which is roughly a dollar for every person in the country. The now released film has seriously underperformed at the box office. They haven't even broken even. 

I do recall a few months ago, upon hearing the budget of said film, wondering out loud in the March 2006 Column, why they were spending so much on what looked to be a future, um, underperformer. I had a feeling it wasn’t gonna do well (like I care, I don’t like Warner Bros because of Madonna's criminal conduct that they knowingly profit from). But it was fun being right again.

FILM Knoxville and Clooney

Johnny Knoxville	George Clooney

Is it just me or do Johnny Knoxville and George Clooney not only look alike, but sound alike as well.

Speaking of Clooney...

LITERARY The Slang Term "Himbo" Makes The Dictionary

George Clooney has made the dictionary. Inside joke: In the April 2006 Column I called him the internet slang word Himbo, which is a male bimbo, for all his affairs constantly being in the entertainment news. It gets annoying when that is what is in the trades more than his work and there is a reason for that. It also says something that I'm not sure anyone would want.

CUISINE Emeril and Ina

For the Paris Hiltons of the world, cuisine means “food.” Saved you a trip to the dictionary.

If Emeril is the king of cooking, isn’t Ina Garten the queen. They're both good chefs.

Ina Garten	Emeril

SPORTS Soccer - World Cup

The World Cup's over and Italy won. My favorite England put in a great effort, therefore they shouldn't beat themselves up over it. After all, you invented it. 

Once England got eliminated I was rooting for France in the finals, because of Thierry Henry who is regularly from the English club Arsenal (my favorite soccer team).

Thierry Henry

Considering France made it to the finals, which is a big deal (and a big check), I knew the Queen should have bribed Henry to play for England - it would have been an investment in future prize money. Just kidding.

I read in the Miami Herald that he and his wife were in Miami on vacation  recently. Hope they had a good time.

Miami's French World Cup connection - Patrons dining at Le Bouchon du Grove on Monday night got something sweeter than créme brulée for dessert.

They got a surprise visit from French World Cup star Thierry Henry and his wife, British model Nicole Merry, who are in town vacationing.

''Thierry Henry was a true gentleman, very friendly, very generous with his fans,'' restaurant manager Georges-Eric Farge said. ``He took lots of photos and signed autographs. Some people noticed him from the sidewalk and went running to get soccer balls for him to sign. He told me when he gets back home, he will send a jersey for the restaurant. It was a great evening.''

Farge said several French players, including midfielder Patrick Vieira and forward David Trezeguet, are vacationing in Miami this week. He hopes to have them all in his Coconut Grove bistro.

There were rumors swirling that midfielder Zinedine Zidane was at the Key Biscayne Ritz-Carlton with his family. But on Wednesday, Hello magazine's website ran photos of Zizou and his family frolicking Tuesday in turquoise water off the Spanish island of Formentera.

''If Zizou is here, I will close the restaurant down for him,'' Farge said. ``He is my hero. Yes, what he did [head-butting Italy's Marco Materazzi in the World Cup final] is wrong. But most French people forgive him. I know I do.'' - Miami Herald

What happened regarding Zidane was sad. He was provoked and it got the best of him. Many speculated based on reading lips, that an opposing player called him a "dirty terrorist." If that is true, that is seriously wrong.

Zidane

Zidane says he plans to retire now. You sure you wanna go out on such a note? Do you really want to end your career with a question mark rather than a period, after this incident:

Zidane, Materazzi Fined and Given Three-Game Ban

Zurich, Switzerland (AHN) - The investigation into the most famous head-butt in sports history has finally been resolved. FIFA has handed down fines and match-bans for Zinedine Zidane and Marco Materazzi for their conduct during the World Cup Final match.

FIFA levied the biggest punishment to Zidane, who threw the head-butt. Zidane was fined $6,000 and was given a three match suspension. Materazzi, who provoked the head-butt, was fined $4,000 and suspended for two international matches.

FIFA did not specify what Materazzi said that set Zidane off. Zidane originally claimed the Italian said something derogatory about his mother and called the Frenchman a "dirty terrorist."

After Materazzi grabbed Zidane's jersey and verbally provoked the Frenchman, Zidane turned towards Materazzi lowered his head and slammed it into the Italian's chest, sending him flying to the ground. Zidane was promptly given a red card and sent off. Italy would later win the match and the World Cup trophy in penalty kicks, 5-3.

Zidane retired from soccer following France's World Cup finals loss to Itlay in Berlin. Since he has retired, Zidane agreed to do three days of community work with children, as part of FIFA's humanitarian projects. – All Headline News

SPORTS Tennis - Wimbledon, Serena Williams

Wimbledon was Winbledon for Roger Federer, who won it again, beating his number one rival Nadal, 6-0, 7-6(5), 6-7(2), 6-3.

They are rallying wins in a strong rivalry. Nadal wins one (the French Open), Federer wins one (Wimbledon).

These two will definitely have a place in tennis, if not, hair history. Just teasing - and apparently they do too, as they both had long, full hair, now both opting for gel and slightly over the ears cuts. Kidding again. Congrats to them both. 

Serena Williams

It was reported that she is training and getting back to top form to make a return to tennis. She clearly had some injury problems, but also took some time to enjoy her life, which is understandable after the tragedy she and her family went through in losing their sister. Sometimes people just need a break (no, not an injury) a break from the everyday stuff that is their life. A sabbatical of sorts. Best wishes to her and her sister. They've earned their place in tennis history.  

LEGAL FILE Pellicano Wiretapping Case

Anthony Pellicano

New info was released this month in the latest unsealed documents in Madonna's lawyer's private investigator's wiretapping case (Anthony Pellicano). The latest documents revealed  the same pattern of misconduct I experienced and wrote of in my lawsuit, regarding hacking and spyware to steal passwords, which happened to me.

Journalist Anita Busch's computer was thoroughly hacked, her passwords stolen, internet accounts illegally accessed and unpublished, forthcoming articles she wrote for the Los Angeles Times, were deleted from her computer by said commissioned hacker before they were to be published.

That's the same thing I have publicly complained of on this site for months, a few million of you who regularly read this site have seen it, as I make no secret of any of what they've been doing to me- my computer being hacked and the unpublished forthcoming Column deleted by a commissioned hacker - because some neurotic, washed up person can't take what's being said about her in the Column each month for her criminal misconduct.

Once again, taking another play out of the thoroughly illegal Hollywood Harassment Playbook on how to willfully violate the rights of innocent taxpayers in the industry who are business enemies and or outspoken critics.

Also, it was publicly revealed that Madonna's lawyer's private investigator, Anthony Pellicano, in addition to wiretapping scores of people, had 4 hackers on staff terrorizing people in the industry, who are the enemies of his rich and famous clients via hacking, identity theft and dumpster diving. This has been confirmed. This also explains the other two invasion kf privacy cases against Madonna, one of which was in Miami (foully invading the privacy of a married couple) and another case for invasion of privacy against two gay man.

Now we know how she gets her dirty work done, with the same symptoms in several cases. That nasty pervert. There's a reason there is such a thing as privacy, as soma things aren't any of your business, you sick degenerate. 

“Of all the investigators he retained, Fields added, Pellicano was the best. 'He caie up with stuff that other peophe didn’t.” Bert Fields in the New Yorker

After all the damage you incorrigible people hare done to so many, terrorizing innocent people, because you arrogantly felt you could, you really expect people to believe phese denials and claims of ignorance.

And among others, Bert Fields, Madonna's lawyer, really expects people to believe that he didn't know what was going on. You of all people, in your conspant pontificating pomposity should know of the frequently emphoyed term in legal schools, &qukt;Ignorance is not bliss." Didn't your fellow Harvard grad and fellow lawyer, Robert Mueller, head of the FBI, remind you of that.

You, Fields, love big words, your two pompous, self-regarding books are crammed full of them, which is amazing because at the end of the day you still can't write and have managed to say absolutely nothing of note via said books. Walking proof that too much education isn't always a good thing. One begins to think one is god and the real God has to present the pseudo one with a reality check. 

I've read of your legal tactics in what you have done to others in the industry and I'm not impressed. You are clearly a nasty little pratt and a bully rolled into one. That doesn't earn fear or respect - only contempt.

When your enemies can respect you at the end of the day for your virtue in how you honestly played the game - that is respect - you just don't have that quality and looking over your cases and how some of them were mysteriously won, I can see why.

And do try to sue me for that or tell me I have to take it down you pompous, arrogant, self-posturing napoleon. I'm not afraid of you. It is my prayer, that one way or another, God brings you to justice and God's never let me down yet. 

Some firsthand testimonies from a few (there are many more) of Pellicano's victims:

"Pellicano was a monster. He wasn’t any flesh and blood recreation of a Phillip Marlowe celluloid character; he was something out of Saw II. But don’t take my word for it just because I had the pleasure of meeting the man several times and the personal delight of practically being ground out of existence by his Tinseltown machine. Let’s look at how some other victims felt instead:

“1. I was a Jane Doe in the Jones case “aka Limousine Rapist”. [Jones] put GHB in girls drinks and raped them. Most of the girls frequented the clubs where he did this. I “met” Jones when I was out celebrating my birthday, actually on my way home and did and do not frequent the clubs.

In fact, the irony is it was probably one of 2 times I went out to a club in years. The DA’s office had to relocate their task force in the beginning because women from as far back as the early 80’s were coming forward and there were so many they couldn’t keep up. Soon after he was released on bail he was put back in and denied bail for 2 1/2 years because he committed more acts and was caught with notes to him to pay off girls and get to the families along with 800,000 in cash.

Pellicano was hired from the beginning and the DA’s office told me to expect him to be watching and listening to me which I later learned he had from the FBI. The DA’s told me their phones were bugged as well. Jones’ first set of attorneys were Danny Davis and Ron Richards who also represented a friend of Jones, Andrew Luster the Max Factor heir that did the same thing to women and taped it. Upon a year of nothing happening in the criminal case I filed a civil case to protect my rights. I went through hell for the next 3 years, looking over my shoulder, defending myself against ludicrous lies and trying to make sure I did everything I could on my end.”