September 30, 2006

Volume 53

1. CELEBRITY Sightings
2. CELEBRITY Look A Likes
3. CELEBRITY Whitney Files For Divorce
4. CELEBRITY Suri Chin Cruise Revealed
5. CELEBRITY Mariah Carey Gets $5.4 Million Necklace From A Prince
6. CELEBRITY Justin Timberlake - He's "Bringing Beatdown Back"
7. CELEBRITY Britney Spears
8. CELEBRITY Brad Pitt
9. CELEBRITY The Donald and The Donald Pt3
10. CELEBRITY Paris Hilton
11. CELEBRITY Ana Nicole Smith 
12. TV MTV Awards Bombed
13. TV The View
14. MUSIC Beyonce
15. BAD JOURNALISM Roger Friedman 
16. LEGAL FILE Madonna Lawsuit
17. LEGAL FILE Robert Mueller (FBI)
18. LEGAL FILE Emmett Till 
19. SPORTS Tennis US Open
20. SPORTS Josh Hamilton
21. POLITICS November Election
22. POLITICS When World Leaders Attack
24. INTERNATIONAL New Al Qaeda Video
25. SPIRITUAL What’s Your Legacy Going To Be

BOYCOTT - 10-1-06 Madonna has once again violated another one of my unreleased copyrights she illegally obtained a copy of, with the b-side to her new single "Jump" being released this month. I am asking you to boycott this CD single. She added the rip off song "History" at the last minute to rip off a forthcoming song from my copyrights. They released a 3 minute clip of it today and it rips off another one of my copyrights.

And if this does not desist, I'm going to add a weekly feature to the web site where I post every forthcoming Warner Bros release and ask the public to boycott each one if that's what it takes to make Edgar Bronfman and Madonna stop this criminal theft, while the useless, cowardly head of the FBI, Robert Mueller, sits on his butt and doesn't do his job. No wonder you can't catch Osama, just useless.


Well, it appears Matt McConaughey was in town, Miami, with his friend Lance “Tour De Lance” Armstrong. This brought out the local women in droves. Just shameless.

To the women of Miami…Do put down the binoculars down. It was getting embarrassing. 

I saw McConaughey first, you wenches, back off. OK, so I saw him on TV first. It still counts, right.


Just kidding.


Don't comedian Dane Cook and athlete Dave Justice look alike:

Dane Cook  Dave Justice

They look their respective races, but they also look alike.

CELEBRITY Whitney Files For Divorce

It was announced this month that Whitney Houston is filing for divorce from singer Bobby Brown.

On a not so serious note… you know Osama thinks he has a chance now, right…

On a serious note, it must be tough for her, as divorce is not easy and she has been through a lot. I wish her the best. I hope everything works out for the best, whatever the outcome. I’m praying for you. God bless.

In home wrecker news…

It was reported that video girl turned tell all book writer, Karrine Steffans, who Bobby Brown is currently living with, as he is broke, is a big contributing factor to the divorce.

In the words of Madea “I should punch you in the face!”

And you know what, I’m not gonna buy your little funky book either (ok, so I wasn’t gonna buy it anyway, she doesn’t know that). 

Seriously, I heard you were on Oprah talking about God, well you need to truly find God and ask for forgiveness, as living with someone else’s husband will bring you nothing but trouble. God's blessings do not flow under such circumstances.  

How did you manage to jump from Bill Maher to Bobby Brown. I don’t get that one. Nothing to do with color, but personality.

What do they have in common? Bill is nuts for his crazy commentary on politics that wreaks of someone who has hit the pipe one too many times and Bobby’s treatment of one of the most talented, beautiful women of our time wreaks of someone who has hit the pipe one too many times.

What was my question again…oh yea, I don’t see what these two men have in common.

CELEBRITY Suri Chin Cruise Revealed

Little Suri Cruise Chin was revealed this month. Don’t look at me like that. Ya’ll know that baby looks Asian. For the one millionth time in this Column, Tom Cruise, what have you done?

The baby looks like Katie Holmes mixed with Asian. Now it is normal, even in interracial relationships for babies to come out totally looking like one parent.

However, there’s no Asian blood in Cruise or Holmes, so people are baffled. One blog even went so far as to post a side by side of the baby and Holmes' former fiancé Chris Klein, who looks a bit Asian.

Joan Rivers even made a joke in her stand up act that the baby "Wears a wig and is Asian."

It didn't help that the baby was hidden from public view for months, which created all that speculation. It came across as having something to hide.


Either way, she’s an absolutely beautiful baby. Just gorgeous. A lovely little child and I hope she will be safe. Scientology is a sick cult and it troubles me to know what's in store for the baby if she is raised in that cult.

Speaking of Scientology misconduct:

"LOOKS like the Scientology mob could be giving Hollywood's Gay Mafia a run for its money.

When Paramount Pictures was renegotiating their deal with Tom Cruise - one of the religion's staunchest supporters - over his take of revenues from "Mission: Impossible III," some Scientologists reportedly tried to make studio boss Brad Grey an offer he couldn't refuse.

According to the online site Radar, a dozen members of the religion surrounded Grey as he left his office one night and badgered him to go easy on Cruise. But Grey stood his ground, and Cruise agreed to a less generous deal.

The movie tanked and Hollywood kingpin Sumner Redstone bounced Cruise from the studio for his bizarro personal conduct. – NY Post

CELEBRITY Mariah Carey Gets $5.4 Million Necklace From A Prince

"Mariah Carey has a big fan in Prince Azim, son of the Sultan of Brunei. The smitten prince sent Mariah an eight carat diamond and platinum necklace and ring by private jet before her concert in New York last week. The jewelry is worth $5.4 million. Mariah's love of sparkly things is well documented so she was no doubt delighted with the gift. - Luxist

Give it here Mariah, you don't need that necklace. Just kidding.

CELEBRITY Justin Timberlake - He's "Bringing Beatdown Back"

Cameron: Justin, no!
Justin: (Angry) I'm gonna sing SexyBack to him and make him run away!


For those of you who don’t know, singer Justin Timberlake and his girlfriend actress Cameron Diaz had an altercation with a photographer paparazzo.

Cameron filed a police report stating she was almost run down by the paparazzo. The paparazzo wrote on his web site he was attacked by Diaz and Timberlake. The pictures and the footage don’t reveal all of what happened. So who’s lying.

Justin: I got this Camizzle!

I rewrote Justin Timberlake’s “SexyBack” to commemorate the occasion, as sung to his beat:

He’s bringing beatdown back

You photographers don’t know how to act…

Go head boy

Get your beatdown on

Go head boy

Get your beatdown on

LOL, that was wrong. But back to the Column...

Let me get this straight…you’re a grown man…with your buddy sitting next to you…in a locked car…and you’re admitting…in public…that Cameron Diaz…a woman…who was a fashion model…allegedly beat you down…and further…her boyfriend…the lead singer of a boy band…from Florida…and the Mickey Mouse Club…who didn’t even have a gun…or a plastic-fast-food-joint-issued-butterknife…allegedly beat you down too.

Right. You can go ahead and get those personalized “punk” license plates right now.

You act like Suge Knight rolled up on you in the bushes and yelled “I know where you live.” That’ll scare just about anybody.

Justin: Why are you running. You scared cause I'm black!

This story is just hilarious (and pathetic, much like your foul, inappropriate criticism of Stephen Baldwin on your celebrity stalker web site). But I figure, if you can dish it, especially to people who don't deserve it, you should be able to take it as well.

Baldwin's probably more of a man than you anyway, Mr. I'm Running From A Girl And Her Boyband Boyfriend. Next time take that boyband beatdown like a man.

Justin Offered Anger Management

September 20, New York - He sings on his new album about love, but there's definitely no love lost between pop star Justin Timberlake and the paparazzi. Once again the "SexyBack" singer has lost his cool and gone after the feisty photogs.  The first time he lost his cool, a paparazzo saw his camera stolen by the singer and his girlfriend Cameron Diaz.  Now he's in hot water again after pictures show Cameron trying her best to restrain her man from going head-to-head with the paparazzi.  This incident also took place on a public street.

In response to the latest outburst, executives at...extended an offer to fund anger management classes for Timberlake in return for an appearance at their upcoming Super Bowl party.

"We at ...would like nothing more than to help Justin Timberlake cope with his anger," stated Christopher Bennett. "He's at a high point of his career and it would be a huge mistake to let an anger problem sidetrack things." - EOG

Justin Timberlake Mocked By Prince

I heard a clip of a song from Justin's new album and he sounds way too much like Prince on that track. So much so that it sounds like a guest performance. Showing you can rip off or imitate another singer is not innovation. I see why Prince made the following joke:

"Prince Takes A Swipe At Timberlake - Pop star Prince took a humorous swipe at Justin Timberlake while performing at an Emmy Awards after party on Sunday night in Hollywood.

Timberlake boasts in his new hit single "he's bringing sexy back", but Prince begs to differ.

He yelled to the massive crowd, "For whoever is claiming that they are bringing sexy back, sexy never left!" - World Entertainment News Network

Sting Slams Justin Timberlake And Beyonce Knowles

"British rocker STING has launched a scathing attack on BEYONCE KNOWLES and JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE, insisting their music is too commercial. The former POLICE frontman is adamant music-making should be a "spiritual" experience - not driven by chart positions and record sales.

For his latest album, SONGS FROM THE LABYRINTH, he even shunned a studio to make sure tracks had the most "organic" sound he could muster. He tells, "Today's music is not designed for me. I don't understand a Beyonce or Justin Timberlake. "For me, singing is a spiritual journey. I'm devoutly musical. As for my voice, I'd say it's become more mature. Encrypted with life, it's developed texture.

"This particular album I made in our home in Tuscany. I don't work in any thematically soundproofed room. I like ambient noises - fire crackling, birds singing, church bells. It's organic." – Contact Music

I agree with Sting on this one. Both records are run of the mill stuff that was done before and put together poorly.

The debuted with strong numbers due to massive amounts of promo then fizzled out immediately. There's no consistency here.

Though I don't agree with inappropriate lyrics, it seems only a few younger mainstream artists like Rihanna, Ne-yo and James Blunt (what are you and Buble doing on cruddy Warner) did anything remotely different or with any production quality this year.

Much of the rest of the so called music that came out in the mainstream on Billboard's chart this year is a haze of the same, recycled stuff.

If you want quality, you clearly have to look outside the mainstream.

Justin Timberlake Dissed By Group Kasabian

"Justin Timberlake is a “puppet” trying to be black, say Kasabian.

British band Kasabian have criticised Justin Timberlake, calling him a “puppet” that makes “money music”.

Tom said of Justin: “He’s a midget with whiskers who is just trying to be black. He’s a puppet in a million-dollar suit who’s had his strings cut off.”

“It’s just money music. Absolute rubbish. You can smell the money coming off it. He’s a k**bhead.”

Kasabian bassist Chris Edwards wasn’t any more forgiving either: “Sexyback? More like hairy back. It’s the worst title of any record I’ve ever heard!” - Fametastic

Justin’s VMA Performance Mocked

While I only caught bits and pieces of the show, as I was online working, I didn’t catch his performance, but the reviews for it were so so:

“MTV VMA boos and yays

The MTV Video Music Awards - the show that's more about the stars that show up than about the music - hit New York on Thursday.

Here are some of the highlights, and lowlights:

-Best Michael Jackson impersonation: Justin Timberlake rocked the robot and a white-boy version of the moonwalk during his opening performance. He also sounded like a prepubescent teenage boy rocking the high falsetto during the first few bars.” - CanWest News Service

Chris Martin Turns Down Justin Timberlake

It appears Coldplay have left Justin feeling Yellow blue. Get the joke, they had a song called "Yellow":

"But did he make up an excuse? with Justin Timberlake, telling him he only sang on his band’s records.

In a TV interview this week Timberlake intimated he made an approach to the singer, only to be rebuffed with the news that Martin only had eyes, or rather vocal chords, for Coldplay.

The pop star told Channel Four’s T4, “I'd like to get Chris Martin in the studio but he won't sing on anything but Coldplay stuff. I respect him and I hate him for that.”

However, Martin was telling little Justin porkie pies, as the singer recorded a duet with another pop star, Nelly Furtado, for her latest album – only to have the track dropped because his vocals sounded “too rocky”.

The British star has also collaborated with rapper Jay-Z for his comeback album… - Entertainmentwise

Justin Went Number One On The Charts

"Despite Sucking, Justin Timberlake Is Number One. The horribly-titled FutureSex/LoveSounds caused quite a stir on the U.S. album charts, stealing the #1 spot and selling more than 684,000 copies in its first week. If reigning in the States isn’t fulfilling enough, Justin Timberlake is also dominating sales in Britain, Canada, Ireland, Australia, Singapore, Switzerland, Germany, Austria, Holland, France, Denmark, and Hong Kong. Simply put: the whole world has gone batty. – Cinema Blend"

The numbers plummeted big time in the second week, but it was still enough to retain the number one.

There’s a reason for his record going number one despite that lackluster lead off single. His audience is comprised mostly of bubble gum fans, who will buy his records, even if it’s him farting over the beats, as long as they think he is still cute. Proven industry fact illustrated with many a boyband.

CELEBRITY Britney Spears

Britney Spears gave birth to her second baby this month. She named him Sutton Pierce (don't "Sutton" run wine commercials?). He and his brother now have the same initials of SPF...are born exactly one year apart...and she bought her own wedding ring. Sigh.

A user on the Oh No They Didn't site humorously commented, "They are trying to get up to SPF 15."

Britney Spears Reportedly Had A Tummy Tuck

"Los Angeles, CA (AHN) - Hard work does pay off but Britney Spears wants to do it the easy way and make it look real.

It has been reported that the pop princess had a tummy tuck after giving birth to her second child, Sutton Pierce, last week.

A tummy tuck involves reshaping and firming the abdomen. In the surgical process, excess skin and fat is removed from the lower and middle abdomen in order to tighten the abdominal wall.

According to NW magazine, the pop princess was dying to have her old, fab body back and requested the delicate, cosmetic surgery be scheduled after giving birth because taking some time off to work with a personal trainer and exercise would just take too long - and not to mention be more painful." - All Headline News Reporter

MTV Poaches Joke From This Column

It's not the first time they've done this. And the site stats have picked up the MTV server on the site already.

Apparently there was a joke at the MTV Awards where Britney and Kevin joked about their son being missing:

"Lamest Joke: Britney Spears and Kevin Federline tried to make light of the public scrutiny they've endured over their child-rearing skills.

"Kevin, where's the baby?" Spears joked in a thick Southern accent.

"I don't know. I thought you had him," Federline said before the show cut to footage of a toddler tearing off in a tiny truck. Groan.” - - CanWest News Service

Back in the March 2006 Sound Off Column, 5 whole months ago, I made that same joke via a pic I captioned:

Britney: "I thought the baby was with you"
Kevin: "I thought the baby was with you":

How unoriginal MTV. Just wackness! And while I’m talking about you MTV, when are you gonna start valuing black people.

Britney Spears and K-Fed Law And Order Episode

I caught the episode of Law And Order clearly based on Spears and it was very blunt. Can't imagine they'd be happy with it. However, their public treatment of their child doesn't evoke sympathy from the public. they can do better for the little boy...and the new one.

Someone remarked online that the name they gave the character that is clearly Spears, is the name of a real singer who opened for her on tour years ago.   


Pitt Talks About Black Adopted Daughter’s Hair

Last month I joked in the Brad Pitt section of the Column about Angelina Jolie, her black daughter, her black lips and black hair products to make her suitable for the role as Marianne Perl. This month Brad Pitt talked about his black adopted daughter and black hair products and some black people didn’t like it. Some black people thought it was no big deal:

"For white people who might be having a little trouble with black- person hair, Carol's Daughter is a fantastic hair product. We got it for Z. Now her hair has this beautiful luster. And it smells nice, too."

Seriously, I don't think he meant anything negative by it. We should save the righteous indignation for the people who really deserve it. He did actually date black women, Thandie Newton and Robyn Givens, and he is father to a black child, so give the guy a break. I just want all of their kids to be treated well and equally and free from the evils of Hollywood. Those are beautiful kids. 

What we really should gang up on him for and beat the pretty off him with our purses for, is how he abandoned Aniston for pouty mouth.  

Pitt Says He Won’t Marry Jolie Because…

Brad Pitt has issued a cop out quote that he won’t marry Jolie until everyone can. So you want everyone to marry Angelina then? Just kidding:

“If my husband would have said that he wouldn't marry me until everyone else in the country who wanted to could get married. My first thought would be; what does someone else's life have to do with ours? Then I would have been very upset and our relationship would have been over. I personally think this is a new copout someone uses as an excuse for not marrying the one they are supposed to love. Does Brad Pitt really think that the country really cares if he ever marries Angelina? It would

1. Jessica Peter: Okay, wait. I'm assuming that by Brad Pitt boycotting marriage for the time being that this will hurry the process of same-sex marriage being allowed? ...Right. So, Brad Pitt has some sort of authority over the law? I'm sure when the higher ups of our country need to make a decision they turn on the boob tube in search of Brad Pitt and what he's standing for today. That is perhaps the most bizarre comment I've ever heard anyone say. Jolie must feel a bit underappreciated but then again, they're both weird. Boo, for Brad Pitt. Samlova, 09/21/2006  

2. I think Brad & Angie are never going get married lol, I have a feeling Brad still loves the calm & homely Jennifer Aniston - Everything went so fast with Angie Jolie. Men love to have a Nest as home, Jennifer is more homely. Pattie 09/21/2006

3. i think brad and angie should marry when all fathers and daughters in the world have reconciled.......(smile!) U R Lame. 09/20/2006     

4. And there are some people who would foolishly applaud and find a reason to praise Brad Pitt if he decided to shove a 10-speed bicycle up his ...faelady 09/20/2006 -Associated Content

CELEBRITY The Donald and The Donald Pt3

Barron Trump: One day I'm gonna own all this:

Barron Trump: Federer won...again!

Donald Trump's little son looks just like him. His older son is his mini-me as well. The baby is a cutie pie and seems to be aware of his surroundings even at his tender little age.

Talk about chip off the old block. They both have the same expression on their faces and that baby was watching that game too.

CELEBRITY Paris Hilton

According to Paris Hilton she recorded her (flopped) album in Miami with Scott Storch.

And how does the bimbo repay the city - she calls it "sweaty and gross" on the red carpet at the MTV Awards. While Holton was in town, she most likely caused one of her famous spikes in the visited city’s CDC STD ratings. Thanks a lot Paris.

It’s funny that she should call Miami “sweaty and gross” when it was reported several times that she was getting “sweaty and gross” with Miami producer Storch, hence him sacrificing his credibility and producing her now flopped album, after he had a string of hits.

Fat Joe: Why did I work on Paris' flopped album
Scott Storch: Why did I work on Paris' flopped album
Lil Wayne: I'm so glad I didn't work on Paris' flopped album

And to think, all Aguilera had to do was pay him his standard fee for producing her previous record which was a hit. You however, to borrow a quote from the Golden Girls, had to seal the deal with “nature’s credit card” and he ended up giving you recycled music he poached from reggae band UB40 among others. Maybe he felt what he was getting was recycled as well and reciprocated the favor.

Last week, I saw a link on TMZ posted by a message board user that lead to UB40’s web site and a track called "Kingston Town," which is another name for the capital of Jamaica, where I was born.

In listening to the song, I was stunned at how much it sounds like the later released “Stars Are Blind” but with my bass line and copyrighted music video treatment that she ripped off. Both UB40's copyrights and separately mine, all secured years before Paris decided she wanted to pretend she is a singer.

And it’s nothing to do with color or her being an airhead valley girl. After all, UB40, lead by a flame haired, white British man sounds like credible, authentic reggae. Not to mention, Jamaicans played the life out of their remake of “Red, Red Wine.”

Side bar: To the Jamaicans reading the site, when it hit the island, shouldn't it have been "Red, Red Stripe" - just kidding.

Paris, however, sounds like Bob Marley -cough- if he had 20 spliffs, 5 Guinness, 3 Red Stripes, got stuck in a vocoder and was struggling with laryngitis…and bronchitis.

There is no question she and Storch deliberately ripped off “Kingston Town.” It’s the same lyric, but changed up a bit, same melody, same harmony and same sound. That’s one of the worst, most blatant rip offs I have ever come across. Just foul.

And Storch shouldn’t have let Paris drag him down like that. He usually isn’t know for mess like this.

Did Paris Do All The Singing On Her Record

Opening A Can Of Worms

Looks like the booed Sarah Silverman had one positive effect - she opened a can of worms at the MTV awards with those statements about Paris' “Stars Are Blind” that has come back to bite Paris is her untalented butt.

Side bar: Who is Sara, experiencing major fugage due to her lack of style, to be talking about anyone’s appearance. The Olsen twin puts her in the dark lookswise, due to how poorly she puts her self together. I love the 80's as much as the next person, but why is Sara rocking the 1986 Punky Brewster look in 2006. She looks like the character in the Princess Diaries...before the makeover. 

She opened a can of worms with her unfunny blend of sarcasm that made people wonder if Paris sang on the record, leading to mainstream posting of articles and site links stating another singer sang on Paris' records.

Paris with novelty toy, a microphone:

It does sound like a template singer was used then Paris's squeaky vocals dropped over it. Something else can be heard breaking through on that record. The question is who.

This is exasperated by the fact that Paris has yet to do a live performance singing, not talk-singing, without heavy background vocals...or lip syncing. That would mean singing "Stars Are Blind" just like it sounds on the record without any vocal help or electronic trickery.

Carah Faye (left)

 Washington, Sept 28: While body doubles and fake boobs may be a hit with most celebs, speculation is rife that hotel heiress Paris Hilton may be using a fake voice.

Cyber junkies claim that they can actually prove that Paris Hilton doesn't actually sing on her new hit album., claims that there's a good chance that the voice heard on Paris' vocals was actually supplied by Carah Faye Charnow, lead singer of the Los Angeles-based band Shiny Toy Guns, reports TMZ.

While a source close to Charnow admits the singer "did record vocals for Hilton ... on demo tracks," he denied that Charnow's voice actually turned up on the finished album. Paris' rep, Elliot Mintz, also debunked the rumors, by saying "like so many Internet conspiracy theories, this one is completely without merit. The voice you hear is of course Paris' voice." ANI

Since the MTV Awards, it seems nothing but bad has happened to Paris. For the first time people are publicly commenting she’s over and her star is on the decline. God says you reap what you sow.  No one is above that. You put out too much bad in the universe and that bad keeps returning to you like clockwork.

It's been a cruel reality check for the porn star turned…well, porn star, Paris.

She was snubbed at numerous events, arrested, caught in several lies, mocked and derided by audiences, her album totally slipped out the charts in three weeks.

Paris Arrested

Paris Is "Bringing DrunkBack"

Wait, I have to pause and laugh at this story…(5 minutes later)…OK, I’m back now. To the police officer that arrested her…can I have your autograph.


This news sent laughter rolling through the internet. I’ve never seen that many people laughing at a celebritwit getting arrested before. 

People Against The Ethical Treatment Of Paris, also known as the whole internet, laughed hard at the news of her arrest.

You know what was weird, remember last month I joked in the Column:

Kudos to the FBI excluding Robert Mueller on shutting down a prostitution ring. The headline on their web site read:

“31 Arrests in Major Prostitution Ring”

Um, but you missed one:

- Sound Off Column August 31, 2006

In light of her arrest this month how ironic.

You know what else made me laugh. She called her publicist at a late hour from jail and the poor man had to get out of bed and bail her out. Had I been a publicist and a client did that, I’d have been like, “Call me tomorrow, you know, after the sun rises, and let me know how it went.”

Feedback from the internet from Oh No They Didn’t:

Here's a very small sampling of thousands of posts made by loads of people, laughing at and cheering about the fact that Paris was arrested. She is not well liked by the public at all due to her mean condcut to numerous people, some of which, landed her in court:  

1. No, that's not a random hooker being picked up for prostitution. Loves it! day_afterday

2. it's a pretty good indication that she was wasted; she would never eat sober. iinfo]ilikeandrewbird

3. Well played. [info]ladylawanda

4. SHE WAS JUST HUNGRY OK :'( - bemylast

5. Well, it's a good thing that she didn't just kill somebody on her way to get some food. [info]jezemel

6. Doesn't she look like one of those tranny hookers as seen on COPS? [info]my_livejournal

7. LOL @ the last one. In this case I would justify police brutality.  [info]hawaii_bombay

8. HA!!! Loves it! [info]krysteener

9. hahah i love it!  [info]xnotlikeyoux

10. that is awesome. why are there so many cops? mercurywingspan

11. you KNOW she was pulling all of the, "BUT IM PARIS!!!" and "ill give u my autograph!!!" lines. [info]ilikeandrewbird

12. Good what a stupid whore. People who drink & drive make me sick! concorde_dreams

13.  Lolz, what a stupid *****. I HOPE SHE CRIED TEARS OF UNQUENCHABLE SADNESS. [info]lauranat

14. she finally got arrested for something? ***** always is smoking pot and drinking, and can't drive worth a crap.maybe this is her downward spiral. getting shut out of clubs and arrested. sounds good! [info]ennui67

15. Someone needs to tell her that she's charged with DUI, not speeding. [info]see_every_part

2006-09-07 04:23 pm UTC (link)

16. Wow. She really is an idiot. [info]candiedheart

17. Am I the only one who actually cheered at this news? Like, vocally cheered!  [info]lyricbomb

18. I'm sure she was drinking because her album tanked. [info]herbatka, 2006-09-07 12:56 pm UTC

19. THIS deserves its' own day...not that silly Irwin guy. /sarcasm kinda. I'm pretty sure I woke up the whole block with my happiness :-p. [info]lyricbomb

20. National Paris Hilton is a Drunk Driver Day! Spread the word. Tell all your friends. Free margaritas for everyone! [info]trendpimps

21. Should the dress code be "As Slutty As Possible" ? It seems to fit with her lately. [info]lyricbomb

22. a birth control patch gets a free entry in the STD give-away![info]jannaface

23. If you can bring a copy of your last STD check-up, they'll validate your parking. [info]trendpimps

24. And her downward fall begins! [info]callmeatomic

25. its about damn time. [info]tantalizinqz

26. That's what I'm saying. You know she's driven drunk numerous times. And how many other times have police let her go for other things? [info]sexy_rebexy

27. seriously. just because she's a celebrity doesnt mean they should let it slide when she's risking other peoples lives while driving ****faced.[info]tantalizinqz

28. hah what an idiot! Hopefully this will show her she's not exempt from the law.[info]xnotlikeyoux

29. It's about time the police did something. I still can't believe her and Paris (or Starving Nachos?) weren't arrested last year even after they admitted it. [info]pessimistchick

30. its about time. [info]dollarbillmofo

Internet feedback from TMZ:

Paris' Peacock Pose

1. He just wanted to see if she would beg him to take them off with favors!Posted at 1:22PM on Sep 7th 2006 by DUH?

2. I hope they lock her sorry RICH *** up.Posted at 1:24PM on Sep 7th 2006 by Israeli Mama

3. Was she arrested or wasn't she? She said on the radio this morning that she was not arrested and it wasn't a big deal. Is she also a liar? Mr. publicist should advise his client that lying about easily verifiable incidents is not a good idea.Posted at 1:27PM on Sep 7th 2006 by RB

4. That's the first handcuff experience outside the bedroom for her. Posted at 1:29PM on Sep 7th 2006 by lala

5. I've gotta take Paris' side on this one. As much as we all love to hate her. She's stupid -- yes -- but she only had a .08. Maybe if she ate without puking up her meals, she could hold her liquor better and drive after one margi. And to #2, obviously she's going to say she wasn't arrested. duh. this is why TMZ gets the real dirt! Posted at 1:31PM on Sep 7th 2006 by SLB

6. She looks like a drag queen from behind. Posted at 1:32PM on Sep 7th 2006 by mishimon

7. I'm pretty certain if you are handcuffed and taken to jail that would be under arrest! Posted at 1:36PM on Sep 7th 2006 by h8er#1

8. Haa! The ***** looks drunk. She can't even stand straight. I can't believe they took the cuffs off. This is why my hubbie and I get into it. He's a cop (LAPD) and I know that they treat celebrites different. It would have been great if she would have lunged at them --- haa haaahaaa --- then maybe they would have zapped her. Posted at 1:36PM on Sep 7th 2006 by Megan

9. I'm pretty certain if you are handcuffed and taken to jail that would be under arrest! Posted at 1:36PM on Sep 7th 2006 by h8er#1

10. YYYYYYeeeeeeeeeeesssssssssssss!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Posted at 1:37PM on Sep 7th 2006 by Maria Conchita

11. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!! Shall I go on. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA !!!!!!! I wet my pants!!!!!!!!Posted at 1:40PM on Sep 7th 2006 by Penny

12. Did anyone notice that she wasn't using her baby voice when interviewed on the radio? And she says she was not charged with DUI so what is the real story, TMZ? Posted at 1:39PM on Sep 7th 2006 by L.A.

13. At the risk of sounding trivial, her butt looks big and weird-shaped in those jeans. Posted at 1:40PM on Sep 7th 2006 by dumpling

Internet feedback from Popsugar

People don't pity Paris:

1. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. This is hilarious. Too funny on the In&Out vs. Carl's. Excuses are like you know what, Paris...They were trying to make a statement!? Yah, Paris. Don't drink and drive. Don't speed. Even if you're dying for a burger. jennifer76

2.  I hate her stupid, monotone voice. xtina

3. HAHAHAH! I almost spewed diet coke through my nose at my desk! DesignRchic Thu,

4. The chick is so self absorbed. tabloidprincess -

5. Me too, Skye! She almost sounds a really bored drag queen. jennifer76

6. Oh please go away, your whole useless life is blown out of proportion because you want it to be.

BTW Parasite my 14 year old brother was killed by a drunk driver who only had two beers. Legally drunk is legally drunk no matter how little it takes you to get there. zeldapommeroy

7.I'm sorry to hear that, zelda. jennifer76

8. I have no tolerance for people who do this.zeldapommeroy

9. glad to hear from someone who has the absolute right to be pissed right off, of course I'm very sorry about your brother. Ive lost three sisters one alcohol related, and your voice is one of the most important there is, know one has the right to take from you what they did! Paris thinking one drink without eating on top of it is not under the influence is a self serving ect. ect. ect. Annie2u59

10. She's an idiot. Puh-leeze. And that excuse about just wanting a burger? C'mon, Paris. In-n-Out makes great burgers, but we don't all swerve for Double-Doubles. strawberrysundae

11. Paris is such a useless individual. For being so rich, doesn't she sound very uneducated? I mean, I know that everyone uses incorrect words here and there, but not everyone has had a prestigious private school education like Ms. Paris Hilton. DulceSkye

12.  paris gathered up a statement to justify her actions ...saying its not what it appears as and was blown out of purportion.

reality will never set into her head....she's not taking the dui & arrest seriously, her attitude is that its not that big of a deal. she deserves 8000 days of community service. flower

13. I hope the judge that does her case is reading all the comments her and her PR people are making. He should show her how serious it is and make an example of her! I'm so sorry for your loss, Zelda. ((HUGS)) wynter

14. Flower, I think she deserves more than that. I think they should have just revoked her license altogether, considering all her hit and runs. She is one ridiculously BAD driver. strawberrysundae

15. She WAS arrested. She was booked. She was photographed. She blew as intoxicated. She is NOT being made an example of, she is getting LESS than her just desserts. She didn't have to stay in jail for 3 hours, she only stayed half that time, and she didn't have to make bail. I don't hate people, it's not part of my belief system, but this girl is getting close. Padraigin

16. This girl has all of the money in the world, and she couldn't find someone to go and grab her a burger, or drive her car?? Doesn't she have assistants and bodyguards around at all times? Comon Paris, just because you weren't thinking doesn't mean you get to make stupid excuses. PowerMouse

17. I didn't even bother listening to the thing. The statements alone posted in this show enough that she's once again just being a spoiled self-absorbed talentless airhead. (rolls eyes) I pity her...she's such a worthless piece of flesh. Myone

18. She's also a liar and pays people to lie for her. Her 15 minutes may have seemed to last a lifetime, but they may be coming to a very slow end. Padraigin

19. She really needs to be made an example of for the sake of all those little girls who look up to her and want to emulate her in every way. Twinkle

20. mugshot! mugshot!!! jennifer76 Thu, 09/07/2006 - 10:39am Report Comment

21. I tivo'd the view this morning and was watching it back. It was great, Babs said Paris couldn't spell and they were making fun of her. SweetPeasMom

More from PETA PETP

“There are some people out there who like Paris Hilton. Those people are stupid. Everyone else hates Paris Hilton, and those are the people I like.

And I love the people who work at Bungalow 8, the New York nightclub, because after the MTV Video Music Awards last Thursday, Paris and her friends (including Brandon Davis and Sean "P. Diddy" Combs) were denied entry to the after party at the club.

The incident even went so far as to end with Paris in tears arguing with police. I don't know about you, but this bit of news just brightened up my day. I guess Karma comes around for everyone. And this just a few weeks after Paris laughed at Tara Reid who was denied entry to Hyde in LA.

Now, if you were dumb enough to buy Paris Hilton's album, you can go ahead and burn it. Don't worry, I'll wait.” - Egotastic

"As if this CD hacking humiliation weren't bad enough for our fave heiress ... it appears that good ol' karma dealt a swift blow to Miss Hilton's ego over the weekend. You may recall that Paris Hilton seemed to enjoy the fact that Tara Reid was denied entrance into the Hyde nightclub in Hollywood while she was able to breeze inside (click HERE to watch the mortifyingly embarrassing video) ... well, Paris and her friends (P. Diddy included) were treated pretty much the same way when they were denied entry into Bungalow 8 here in NYC

Apparently, Paris Hilton, Brandon Davis and Diddy were causing such a commotion outside the club because they weren't allowed inside that the police had to come by and calm them down. Awww ... Paris has feelings just like any regular person. Now we know what makes a millionairess cry. On the other hand, Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen had no problem getting into the after -VMA party at Bungalow 8 on that same night, here are pictures of the twins exiting the club – PITNB

Paris Hilton Arrested For Investigation Of DUI

"LOS ANGELES, California (AP) -- -- Paris Hilton was arrested early Thursday for investigation of driving under the influence, police said.

Hilton, great granddaughter of hotelier Conrad Hilton, was arrested shortly before 12:30 a.m. in Hollywood, said police Officer I. Isabella, who declined to give his first name.

"The officers observed that Hilton exhibited the symptoms of intoxication. A field sobriety test was conducted at scene, and the officers determined she was driving under the influence," Isabella said, reading a police statement.

Kimberly Stewart, Rod Stewart's daughter, reportedly was in the vehicle with Hilton.

Hilton, 25, was booked on suspicion of misdemeanor DUI and released, he said." - CNN

Paris' Court Hearing Postponed

"PARIS Hilton's court hearing on drink driving charges has been postponed until December, justice officials said yesterday.

The 25-year-old heiress was due to be arraigned on charges of misdemeanour drunk driving at a Los Angeles court today in connection with her arrest earlier this month.

Hilton's attorney, Howard Weitzman, said he had requested and been granted a postponement until December 5. Weitzman said he sought postponement "in order to determine if and how the case will ultimately be resolved."

The maximum penalty under California law is six months jail and a $1300 fine but officials have indicated it is highly unlikely Hilton would face such stiff punishment for a first offence.

Instead she could be forced to attend an alcohol education program and be stripped of her driver's license." - News Australia

Paris Hilton Busted In The Bushes With Still Married Travis Barker

Well, well, well. I see Mr. Barker didn’t receive the Sound Off Column’s STD Preparedness Kit with footnotes about Parisitis STDitis, which is sweeping Hollywood like a bad rash. The STD Preparedness Kit is modeled after the Miami Hurricane Preparedness Kit.

Note to guys: When you mess with Hilton, your stock goes way down in the eyes of women, because she makes such a prostitute of herself and sleeps with everyone. Ask around and they’ll tell you.  

Paris thinks this makes her hot, but it's free sex, you idiot. For men free sex is like turning down free money. It doesn't mean they love you. It just means your getting used no end. 

Anyway back to the article. When it was first reported in the press, Paris did what she always does, lied her butt off. She said it wasn't true. When they published the pics of her kissing him in the bushes (how pervy), she said it was his friend. When they enlarged the pic and identified and pointed out Barker's tattoos, she went drunk quiet.

Travis with look of shame. She even wore a wig and her friend's coat in an attempt to trick the press over a relationship she lied about:

Meanwhile, his wife, whose statements I read on a news site, where she proclaimed her love for him and hopes of a reconciliation, must be devastated and disgusted. She said she believes it was going on before her separation.

I've written about this a few times this year. It's like she perversely enjoys wrecking marriages and relationships.

"Paris Hilton is romancing blink-182 drummer Travis Barker , "They like each other very much," says her rep.

The socialite had strongly denied she was dating Travis Barker, but her rep was forced to admit they were a couple after they were seen kissing.

Travis, who's in the midst of a nasty split from wife Shanna Moakler, and Paris, 25, were first spotted several weeks ago at Las Vegas club Spearmint Rhino. "They were making out like crazy," an eyewitness noted reports NW Magazine.

They were then seen the following night at another Las Vegas club, Pure.

However, Paris refuted eyewitness accounts, claiming, "I did not make out with Travis Barker. I was with his friend Alex, who I met that night. He looks like Travis ... people must have ... confused him with Travis."

Paris's hook up with Travis, 30, has caused a falling out with jealous oil heir pal Brandon Davis.

What's more, Travis's estranged wife Shanna says she feels "betrayed".

"I feel like it was done out of spite," says Shanna, who believes Paris and Travis hooked up before she split with her hubby. – The Bosh

Paris "Wonky Eye" Hilton gets a Barker - IDLYITW

Paris has no shame and doesn't care about anyone but herself:

“Paris Hilton spotted getting friendly with Travis Barker”

Paris Hilton should perhaps be listening to her own wise words after shocking fellow clubgoers by getting down and almost-dirty with Travis Barker at two Las Vegas clubs.

Paris met former Blink 182 drummer Travis in the Pure Nightclub in the city last week and, according to an onlooker, “before long they were making out on one of the VIP beds. They were groping and grinding with their clothes on.”

“All her friends and her sister Nicky were there, just looking on stunned.”

The new couple then headed over to the Spearmint Rhino lapdancing club but: “Their steamy show in their limo near the rear VIP private entrance was more sizzling then the lap dances inside.”

“Guys were standing around watching.” The two were then spotted sneaking into a hotel together in Los Angeles on Monday.

Paris had previously claimed she was planning to be celibate for a year while Meet the Barkers star Travis only split from his wife, Shanna Moakler, two months ago. – Fametastic

"Has Paris Hilton Lost Her Mojo?"

"Hotel Heiress Rejected from Hot NYC Hangout. Sept. 16, 2006 — Paris Hilton, famous for being famous, is used to living the good life and getting star treatment. But in a recent turn of events, it appears Paris Hilton's star may be descending rapidly.

"Paris Hilton has been having a string of bad weeks lately," said ABC News entertainment contributor Katrina Szish. "It seemed like nothing could go wrong in this girl's world. But lately, everything has been going wrong."

Last week, the hotel heiress was arrested in Hollywood on a D.U.I. charge.

This week, Paris and her posse were denied access into the Rose Bar, a hot new hangout in New York City's Gramercy Park Hotel.

"It's ironic that the ultimate hotel heiress was dissed by the hottest hotelier," commented Szish.

"Hot hotelier" Ian Schrager provided this statement to ABC News.

"It was nothing personal against Paris Hilton," Schrager said. "In fact, I've never met her, but we're doing something different here at the Rose and the Jade Bar at the Gramercy Park Hotel."

Szish said, "He really wants to try and keep it different from the big loud clubs. He doesn't want Paris and her people and her paparazzi and hangers-on in that space. He wants to keep it as exclusive as possible."

It gets worse. Insiders say that Paris was also rejected at the door of a fashion week party hosted by Milla Jovovich, one of Hollywood's top models.

Despite recent news, Szish says this likely not the end of the Paris phenomenon.

"We definitely haven't seen the last of Paris Hilton," she said. "No matter what this girl does, she seems to bounce back." - AP

"Is Paris Hilton's Star Fading?"

"It sure looks that way...Paris Hilton’s popularity is finally waning and she is being turned away from the best parties as she slowly slides down the celeb-o-meter.

The tide started to turn against Paris with the release of her debut album ‘Paris’; after renegade British artist Banksy made a mockery of her album cover in some UK record stores she became a laughing stock.

After failing to get into Bungalow 8 and crying on the street about it Paris was then arrested for a DUI last week…tut tut.

On Friday, according to, Paris failed to gain entrance to Ian Schrager's Gramercy Park Hotel where the likes of Orlando Bloom and Winona Ryder were kicking back.

The doorman refused to let Paris enter after he was warned by his boss to bar "the likes of Paris Hilton and her ilk” who “are not welcome here."

Now there’s a man who know how to separate the stars from the slebs."- Entertainmentwise

Paris' Perverted New Video

Her new music video is provoking cries of pedophilia from people. It features her in her underwear, getting way too close to a 13 year old boy and dating him. Sick! 

Which makes the next story quite ironic and I do believe she did it:

Paris Hilton Cleared Of Teen Booze And Drugs Claims

"After Simple Life investigation...Paris Hilton has been cleared in a police investigation into claims she’d offered teenagers booze and marijuana before shooting a segment of her TV show.

It has been alleged the socialite had offered to “loosen up” youngsters by giving them Bourbon and joints before they appeared in a segment of her TV show ‘The Simple Life: Interns’.

However, Baltimore police who investigated the claims have found there is no evidence to substantiate the allegations. That just leaves the cops to deal with Paris’ upcoming trial on  drink-driving charges." - Entertainmentwise

Paris Not So Bright

"Paris has never been accused of being that bright, especially when it comes to geography. Remember when she didn't know that London was in the UK? I hate to make fun of someone for being dumb, but the girl gets to travel the world so she should pick up a little more along the way. Here's the latest - she's close to being all set to promote for, an eco-friendly accessories company but they were a bit concerned when Paris thought Haiti was in France. Here's more:

For every recycled fashion product that people buy online, plants a tree through an organization called Trees for the Future. 

“Ecoist is hoping that Paris will join them in October on a trip to Port-Au-Prince to plant more than 40,000 trees,” a source says. “But when she was told about the trip, Paris had no idea where Haiti was. When she was told that they speak French there [along with Creole], she said, ‘I wouldn’t mind spending a few days there and the weekend in France."

Paris Least Favorite In Poll

"It seems even too much partying hasn't helped big socialite Paris Hilton become a favorite among people, for while earlier this week she admitted something the rest of the world already knew - that she is 'stupid', a recent survey proves that almost half of Brits consider her 'dumb' enough to not have a word with her.

In a poll by Orange, the hotel heiress has topped the list of celebs Brits would most want to hang up on, after winning approximately 50 per cent of the total votes.

Celeb chef Jamie Oliver, British Prime Minister Tony Blair and multi-award-winning writer-comedian Ricky Gervais have topped the list of celebs people would like to chat to." - SAWF

"Paris Hilton, Why Are You Crazy?"

"It’s been a trying couple of weeks for Paris Hilton. Her debut album Paris dropped into stores and although it wasn’t completely panned by critics (it’s not as bad as you want it to be), it wasn’t a commercial success either. Only 77,000 copies sold in the first week and that figure looks to plummet.

This could be the beginning of the Hilton backlash. Recently, while in New York City, Hilton was reportedly denied access to three exclusive clubs (the high-profile Bungalow 8) and forced to wander the streets in her limo crying into a purse that could probably economically save a country in Africa.

And everything was capped off on Thursday, September 7, when she was arrested by police for a DUI. Reports say she was driving erratically and had a blood-alcohol level of .08 percent, the minimum amount in California to warrant an arrest. Her excuse? She was really hungry and wanted In-and-Out Burger.

She should do an ad campaign with them by crashing through a wall with her car and screaming “Oh yeah!” a la the Kool Aid Man.

And I’m not even going to touch the sexual connotation of Hilton being in a commercial for a place that has “In-and-Out” in its name." – Ecollege Times

"Paris Hilton Has Reportedly Been Barred From A Top New York Celebrity Hangout"

"The socialite had been partying at the lavish Marquee club with friends on Friday night (08.09.06) before she tried to get into an event at Ian Schrager's Gramercy Park Hotel.

However, the host - whose guests included 'Pirates of the Caribbean' actor Orlando Bloom and Winona Ryder - reportedly told his security team not to let the 'House of Wax' actress in because "the likes of Paris Hilton and her ilk are not welcome here."

It's not the first time Paris has lucked out on the social scene recently.

On Sunday (10.09.06) she allegedly tried to crash a party being held by 'Fifth Element' star Milla Jovovich but only arrived as all the other guests had left.

Two weeks ago Paris was seen sobbing in the street after she was turned away from a nightclub.

The hotel heiress had been refused entry to Bungalow 8, in New York, because bouncers said it was "full to capacity."

An eyewitness said: "She was sobbing and kept saying she was Paris Hilton and she didn't understand - all she wanted to do was dance!" - BANG Media International

Paris Snubbed By Gramercy Park

"RARE REJECTION - PARIS Hilton is not wanted at Ian Schrager's Gramercy Park Hotel. Friday night, after partying at Marquee and drinking "lots" of vodka and pineapple juice, Hilton tried to join Orlando Bloom, Winona Ryder and Josh Lucas in the hotel's Rose Bar, but bouncer Damien stopped her due to Schrager's decree that "the likes of Paris Hilton and her ilk are not welcome here." Hilton had further bad luck Sunday when she crashed the party at Milla Jovovich's townhouse - after the bash was over." - NY Post

"Talentless Hilton's On Set Antics Slammed"           

"Socialite PARIS HILTON has been blasted by co-star SIMONA FUSCO, who has accused the heiress of almost ruining new movie BOTTOMS UP with her diva antics. Fusco claims Hilton, who was arrested on Thursday (07SEP06) on suspicion of drink-driving, is "annoying" and insists the aspiring actress has no talent at all.

Fusco fumes, "I don't think there's any talent there. My biggest problem with Paris was that she was always late on the set. It became very annoying. Everyone gets tired. "By the time Paris finally showed up, she was usually coming from a party. She never memorised her lines. So now, not only does she show up late, but on top of it she didn't have her lines ready to go. "It was a very long day working with Paris." – Contact Music

"For Once, Paris Hilton Wanted To Duck Publicity"

"For once Paris Hilton wasn't happy to be the center of attention. Hours after paparazzi swarmed the Hollywood police station where the celebutante was booked for investigation of drunk driving she told Los Angeles radio host Ryan Seacrest people were making too big a deal out of her arrest." – AP

Paris Allegedly Punk’d By Virgin’s Sir Richard Branson In The Presence Of Royalty

"As the evening at Sir Richard Branson's Oxfordshire estate progressed to celebrate his son's 21st birthday bash, it saw one of its 300 guests Paris Hilton nursing her bruised ego, after falling victim to an elaborate practical prank set up by the host himself.

As the evening at Sir Richard Branson's Oxfordshire estate progressed to celebrate his son's 21st birthday bash, it saw one of its 300 guests Paris Hilton nursing her bruised ego, after falling victim to an elaborate practical prank set up by the host himself.

The hotel heiress had asked if she could come to the Mad Hatter-themed bash dressed as Alice in Wonderland - guaranteeing her a starring role.

But when the Virgin tycoon found out, he secretly made all 60 waitresses at the event wear the same Alice costumes, and he rubbed salt into Paris' wounds when she arrived by deliberately mistaking her for one of the serving staff and asking her to serve him a drink.

"It was one hell of a party. Paris found herself looking more like Tweedledum as she was surrounded by dozens of other Alices," the Daily Mail quoted a Virgin insider, as saying.

The 150,000 pounds birthday bash for Sam Branson had many VIPs and the list included Princes William and Harry, Prince William's girlfriend Kate Middleton, supermodel Kate Moss, Fergie's daughters Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie and Sir Bob Geldof." - ANI

Paris Gives Homeless Man Money For Publicity

How convenient that the cameras and reporters were there at that exact moment:

 “Paris Hilton may be many things, but she sure isn't stingy, especially when she's coming out of a McDonalds drive-thru and a pan-handler asks her for money. "You Paris Hilton! Can I get a hundred dollars?" was the exact quote. Before Paris could answer, then man came down quite a bit, asking "how 'bout a dollar?" But Paris heard the first request and reached beside her and handed the man a crumpled $100 bill.

She then posed with him and remained polite, even when he asked about "Lionel Richie's daughter" ... Hmmm ... I really wonder if Paris would have been so generous with her $100 dollar bills if there weren't photographers standing around to notice. What is it that they say about the generosity of an heiress in the woods if no one is around to bear witness?” - PITNB

"Paris Hilton Admits She Is Stupid"

"Hotel heiress Paris Hilton has admitted something the rest of the world already knew — she’s not that bright.

when she was quizzed by Los Angeles police it emerged she wasn’t a reliable witness as she could not remember what happened. “Like I really, I don't remember,” she said on police tapes. “I'm not, like, that smart. I forget stuff all the time.” - Mumbai Mirror, India

Paris Hilton Flips Out At Fashion Show

More of Paris' abusive behavior:

"Paris Hilton lost her cool backstage at a fashion show in New York this week. The heiress and party loving socialite was getting ready for her catwalk appearance at the Heatherette Fashion show when she got fed up with a photographer taking pictures of her. According to The Mirror, she flew into a rage and demanded that he leave. Hilton yelled: ” Delete that photo or I’ll take your camera.”

The source added: “Paris was having her hair done and wanted no one around her. When another snapper came through, she screamed: “I said no more ****ing photos, why do you never *****ing listen?” Her humour didn’t improve when she couldn’t find her mobile phone later. The source revealed:” Then she accused her security of losing her phone. It was found under her purse.” – Female First

Paris Still Drunk …But She Said She Doesn’t Drink


"Exclusive: Paris Hilton Has A Stinking Dirty Mouth"

"Exclusive: Paris Hilton Has A Stinking Dirty Mouth Paris Hilton -- the reigning queen of nothing was, of course a part of the always-classy VMA's on Thursday.

New York City -- The gorgeous and the hungry know that a strong city night is usually punctuated with a very late/ very early stop at the downtown eatery Cafeteria. So, as those of us whose parents don't own a chain of luxury hotels wait on line, Paris Hilton strolled right into the spot.

Did I say "strolled"? Make that stumbled. There were lots of celebs on hand, as Diddy was in the house and Damon Wayans was making the rounds. But nobody finds a way, except maybe Lindsay Lohan, to *** it up like our heroine.

Long story short - Paris appeared bombed. She danced around, doing the Mailbu Rum Two Step from fab to fab. She eventually got by our party, and one of my co-horts greeted her with a sincere "Hello Paris", which was promptly ignored, or possibly not recognized.

Now, we received no salutation, however her mouth was kind of to give us something to remember her by. We did not witness any frankfurters present, but Paris had the worst hot-dog breath I've ever detected, even after a double-header at Shea. It was RANK. So it turns out my first meeting with the simple Simple Life star did not disappoint. The Hilton legacy marches on." – Cinema Blend

Paris The Coward

Why is it she’s always provoking fights then getting other people to fight her battles for her? Why is she always hiding behind other people when she gets up to her mischievousness? A real person wouldn’t do that. Only a coward would.

First Brandon Davis then Scott Storch – and to verbally attack another woman. And what kind of men would be berating a woman’s vagina for the cameras. Probably men with vaginas. What kind of conduct is that?

As for Paris, you are disgusting. A real little she-devil. But I don’t need to tell you that. The whole internet is doing it for me. You should be able to appreciate that since you love attention so much.

Paris The Liar

This girl is such a liar. Lying that she is darn near a virgin, was broke when she moved to LA, never accepts her parents money, is celibate, doesn't drink, is a good role model (even interviewer Ann Curry had to stop her on that one), isn't a home wrecker, different people attacked her (Nick Carter, Greek Heiress), isn't cheating with a married man and doesn't break up relationships (when many say she broke up their relationships). And she wonders why the public literally hates her at this point and spews such venom about her.

Hilton Slams Gervais

"Socialite/singer Paris Hilton has fired back at British funnyman Ricky Gervais for snubbing her on the upcoming season of his comedy show "Extras."

The hotel heiress has branded the comic genius too insecure to work with actresses of her caliber after her pleas to appear on the show, which has previously starred Ben Stiller, Samuel L. Jackson and Kate Winslet, were rebuffed.

She says, "I guess he's obviously scared of starring alongside an A-lister."

You need to stay off the crack pipe. He is an actor. You are a porn star. He can act. You act like a prostitute. He’s won awards for his acting. You’ve won boos for yours.

You are not A list. Jennifer Aniston, Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie can be referred to as A list. Britney Spears is C-List, C for country (hey, she called herself country, I didn’t).

You Paris are P-List, P for porn. Now you know what the P in Paris stands for – porn. 

Paris Hilton Vamped for Carl's Jr. but Craves In-N-Out Burger

Talk about brand loyalty (not):

"Last year, Carl's Jr. ran a commercial featuring Paris Hilton cavorting to the tune of Cole Porter's "I Love Paris."

But when it comes to hamburgers, it seems like Paris' true love is not for Carl's -- but for In-N-Out Burger." - Los Angeles Times

CELEBRITY Ana Nicole Smith 

This month, Anna Nicole Smith's son Daniel died of an accidental drug overdose. His mother has battled with drug abuse as well. In his last hours, he kept complaining of being very sleepy. This story is quite sad:

Model 'shocked' at son's drug use

A PATHOLOGIST investigating the death of model Anna Nicole Smith's son said overnight that since the cause has been found, the case can be closed without holding a planned inquest in the Bahamas next month.

Pathologist Cyril Wecht, hired by the Smith family to investigate, said the 20-year-old died of an accidental but fatal interaction of three drugs: anti-depressants Lexipro and Zoloft, and methadone, a painkiller used mostly to treat heroin addiction.

Dr Wecht said Anna Nicole Smith did not know her son was taking methadone and had no knowledge of any heroin use by him.

"This is one of the mysteries remaining in this case – why he was taking methadone. It could have been as a painkiller. It is a legitimate drug for that use. His family is shocked. ... I am told that Mrs. Smith was completely in the dark about Daniel taking it," he said.

Star Magazine reported on Thursday that Mr Stern and Ms Smith were married aboard a yacht in the Bahamas but no representative for Ms Smith was available to confirm or deny the report.

Of the three drugs found in Daniel Smith's body, only Lexipro had been prescribed.

Dr Wecht said he had not been told where Daniel Smith had gotten the drugs found in his body.

"There is now no reason to go ahead with the inquest because there is nothing to suggest foul play. But that would be up to a magistrate in the Bahamas to decide," Wecht said. - News Australia

TV MTV Awards Bombed

It was their worst show yet that was full of award winners the public didn't know and didn’t want to win said awards.

Ratings way down for MTV VMAs

“Ratings for the MTV Video Music Awards plunged 31% among viewers in the cable network's target demographic, those aged 12-34.

Nearly 3.9 million viewers in that age group tuned in for Thursday's 23rd annual event at Radio City Music Hall in New York, still enough to beat all other channels for the night in that demo.

The total viewership, 5.8 million, tumbled 27% from last year, and represents almost half of the audience the show drew on MTV in 2002.

But online, MTV broke its own record for the most single day streams for its broadband platform, Overdrive, with 3.9 million. MTV's last Overdrive high was reached the day after last year's awards show, with 3.3 million.” -  CNN

“Viewers abandon MTV Video Music Awards” - Reuters/Hollywood Reporter


TV The View

Barbara To Rosie: Quit Blogging!

“Barbara Doesn't Want Rosie to Blog. "I didn't like the blog," Walters tells Newsweek of a post in which O'Donnell complained about a promotional skit for the new season. "I saw the new view promos," O'Donnell wrote on her Web site. "Found myself/ in the position/ I loathe the most/ powerless."

But Walters is hoping O'Donnell will be a team player. "I'm counting on Rosie's intelligence and sensitivity and humor," she tells Newsweek. "This is, after all, an entertainment show. It is based on people who like each other and are having a good time, not on people who are arguing and unhappy."

Soon after Walters spoke to the magazine, she called back to say she'd just received flowers with a card reading, "Barbara, I only want the promos and the show to be great. And I love you. Love, Ro."

O'Donnell also says she has no hard feelings toward former co-host Star Jones Reynolds – although she admits she'd refused to be a guest on The View when Reynolds was there.

The differences started, O'Donnell says, when "we had a little sort of discussion when Martha Stewart was in prison, when I questioned why it is women don't stick up for each other the way other minorities do, such as O. J. Simpson being accused of murder still had the support of the majority of the black community."

O'Donnell says Reynolds "was not happy with what I said or the way I said it. The next day, she told me she didn't appreciate what I said. I told the bookers, 'I'm glad to fill in if you need someone – if she's not there.' I don't want to fight with her."

But O'Donnell says she had no hand in Reynolds's dismissal. "I would love to think I had the kind of power to say 'Fire her,' " she says. "But what would my motive be for ruining her life?" – TMZ

That comment about the black community was inappropriate and untrue. Some feedback from TMZ:

1. Everyone acts like Babwa walters is royalty, but she is overrated! What has the ol battleaxe done all these years but kiss *** to self absorbed celebrities on her stupid specials?

Later, she came worthless TV trash like The View, quite possibly the most useless show on TV. The View also has the dubious honor of imposing MONstar Jones onto America on a continual basis. Forget about OJ, THAT is the crime of the century!

Now, Babwa is going to push Rosie "Pumkinhead" O'Donnell back on TV to further numb the unwashed masses. Bottom line, the Livewire View is- All the h*s on the View are annoying. "Livewire inspires me to be a better person." - Burt Reynolds, 2003 Posted at 11:44AM on Sep 4th 2006 by Livewire

2. #1, Livewire: Good for you! I couldn't agree more--and I couldn't have said it better myself. Posted at 11:53AM on Sep 4th 2006 by Alyn Brodsky

3. Rosie-The View has the same potential for disaster as Terrell Owens with the Dallas Cowboys. And should be as much fun when the arrangement comes apart. Posted at 11:57AM on Sep 4th 2006 by Scoob

4. Wait'll Babwa finds out that Rosie is a chronic farter and every so often lets go with a boomer that can pull paint off the ceiling and everyone reaches for their gas masks. Then she'll REALLY have a fit and regret inviting the Loudmouth to join her silly little kvetching circle. Posted at 12:23PM on Sep 4th 2006 by The Maven

5. LIVEWIRE - you are on fire today with all your spot on comments. Kudos my friend! Posted at 1:00PM on Sep 4th 2006 by lala

6. By hiring someone raunchy like Rosie to lead the view tells you everything you need to know about the show. I will not be missing anything buy not watching. Posted at 1:32PM on Sep 4th 2006 by lorane petrish

Rosie Blames Oprah

“You might think that Tom Cruise doesn't have a single fan left, but you would be wrong. We found one. Her name is Rosie O'Donnell. Rosie may not be the last person who still loves Cruise—Katie Holmes? his mother?—but she's probably the only one who blames America's favorite talk-show host for starting his troubles. "I saw him doing the couch jumping," says Rosie while nursing a beer at a Manhattan restaurant. "I wasn't mad at him. I was mad at Oprah. Oprah, couldn't you have said, 'Tommy, come here! Don't jump'." Rosie says that if Cruise had lost it on her show, she'd have sat him down and retaped the segment.” – Newsweek

How is Oprah to blame. She didn't tell him to jump up and down on that couch.

When Barbara Is Away The Lesbian Will Play

"See what happens on "The View" when Barbara goes away for a few days? As the women of morning television reminisced over schoolyard memories, it was brought to the audience's attention that Rosie O'Donnell herself was a high school homecoming queen. Joy, ever ready with a spicy quip, remarked, "Was it based on being pretty ... errr ... I thought homecoming queens were more like Jessica Simpson." Oh, snap, girl. 

Rosie clearly didn't take too kindly to this: She said that she missed Star Jones -- "I'm feeling the love" -- and then did some temporary housecleaning of her own, announcing, "After the break, we're going to come back without Joy Behar." To "The View," we say thank you for consistently delivering us a hot dish of morning *****iness; no word yet on whether Star will take Rosie up on her offer." – TMZ

Rosie, Madonna And Britney Top The "Worst" Looking In Hi-Definition TV List

Rosie and Madonna made the list. Lesbians really cleaned up on that list, didn’t they:

"Rosie O'Donnell has topped another 'worst' list.  The comedienne turned talk show host has been named the "worst looking" celeb in High-Definition TV according to Phillip Swann of, a website that covers the HDTV industry.

The web site releases the list annually.  They are none too kind to one-time hottie Britney Spears either as she is the youngest celebrity to hit the bad looking Hi-Def list.

The web site gives this assessment of Rosie.

"The loud-mouthed comedienne recently joined the cast of ABC's The View, but lemme tell ya, no one enjoys the view of Rosie in high-def. Most people use a wash cloth to clean their face; but Rosie looks like she uses a Brillo pad. Her face is extremely coarse and rough-looking in high-def, particularly when she sits next to the youthful and vibrant countenance of Elisabeth Hasselbeck."

Ouch - that's harsh! For the one-time bombshell Britney the web site dishes this:

Mrs. Federline is just 24, but she looks 34 in HDTV. Her skin is puffy and covered with small blemishes. In high-def, she looks like a different person. And considering the disappointing sales of her last two albums, her record company might think she's become a different person.

Howard Stern is second and Teri Hatcher (who topped last year's roundup) falls to number three.

Burt Reynolds, Madonna, Barbara Walters, Meredith Vieira, Mick Jagger and Ray Liotta round out the top ten.  The assessments are brutal and are here:

8. Madonna

Madonna reportedly has had some cosmetic surgery on her face. But it certainly didn't make her a cut above the rest. The pop star's cheeks look more caved in than a West Virginia coal mine. It's very unnatural looking. In fact, she's starting to look like Gloria Swanson in Sunset Boulevard. Except, please, no close-ups, Mr. DeMille.”

4. Britney Spears

Mrs. Federline is just 24, but she looks 34 in HDTV. Her skin is puffy and covered with small blemishes. In high-def, she looks like a different person. And considering  the disappointing sales of her last two albums, her record company might think she's become a different person.

2. Howard Stern

In high-def, Howard looks a little like Cher -- that is, if you saw Cher two minutes after she first woke up in the morning. The shock jock reportedly underwent plastic surgery to try to improve his oft self-maligned appearance, but he might want to consider filing a malpractice suit. This is the worst abuse of a surgical scalpel since Jack the Ripper roamed the streets of London." 

MUSIC Beyonce

New Album Sales

Her new album opened with strong numbers, but then tanked immediately in the second week. It dropped 72% in the second week and took a further big dip in the third.

Beyonce Steals Her Butt Off For New Unoriginal, Formulaic CD

The internet is loaded with blogs slamming Beyonce for stealing for her new CD. This is bad. And she loves to claim she is doing something "different" and "original." You know you're desperate when you're stealing from Britney.

And some of them, Beyonce, Britney and others, stole from Janet. "Crazy" and "Anticipating" by Britney are blatant Janet rip offs. That dance routine Beyonce did at the VMA's was another Janet rip off as well. Just uncreative.

Beyonce stole so much from contemporary artists who released the following items a few years before she ripped them off this summer, that she is being slammed on many web sites for said stealing. Here are a few of the comparative pics from different web sites slamming her:

"Beyonce = A Real Swagger Jacker. Are y’all beginning to believe that she is a little overrated?" - Honorable Media:

Beyonce’s Illiterate Interview Responses

Last month I wrote about Beyonce and her poor use of grammar. This month she proved me right:

“Here's an interview Beyoncé gave while in Japan on a promotional tour. One thing is very clear after watching this video: Public speaking is clearly a challenge for Bee. My one complaint is that, at over 9 minutes, this video is way too long. But the payoff comes at the end of the video when Bee says, "I try to give my 100% divided attention", to whatever project she's working on. And again when she says she's very close with her "intermediate family" instead of immediate family.”- Sandra Rose Site

Beyonce Makes Not So Smart Statements

"Beyoncé's popularity slides - Beyoncé Knowles has sparked controversy by saying she only makes records for black people. Since the Déjà Vu singer made the astonishing statement sales of her new album, B'Day, have fallen by 70 per cent in the US.

Beyoncé, 25, said in an interview with Blender magazine: "I make black records. I write records like I speak, and I don't try to change my songs so everyone else likes them."

The singer has also admitted she can relate to celebrities who attack the paparazzi. Beyoncé said: "It must be really scary to have your children in front of all these people. That's your kids. That's when Mama Knowles is gonna be punching some photographers!"

Meanwhile, Beyoncé's name was booed at the MOBO awards in London when she failed to turn up to collect her three prizes. The Crazy In Love singer received the most awards after her single Déjà

Vu won the Best Song and Best Video categories and she was named Best International Female at the ceremony - which recognises music of black origin." Tonight ZA

Beyonce Booed At Mobo Awards In England

"In today's tongue twister, Beyonce was booed in Britain when she was a no-show at the MOBO Awards. The queen B failed to show up to collect her three awards even though she is on the continent with her man Jay-Z, who also won an award.


Word is that she didn't want to run into either Rihanna or former Destiny's Child member LeToya Luckett, both of whom performed on the show. The show was co-hosted by Coolio (where'd they dig him up) and the other big winner of the night was UK soul sensation Corinne Bailey Rae. - Vibe

Beyonce And Her Mom Slammed For Clothing Line

Beyonce: I rarely wear these clothes she designed because they ride up too much.
Beyonce's Mom: That's not what I told you to say. Don't make me slap you in public...again!


It appears retailers are having problems with Beyonce and her mom's J-Lo rip off clothing line House Of Dereon, known on the blogs as House Of Derriere, prompting retailers to send them back.

Here's a snippet of an interview on CBS in Chicago gone awry, all while Beyonce sits there grinning with a vacant look on her face:

Reporter: Your clothes are sold in about a dozen stores in the Chicago area. We did get a phone call from a couple of those stores who said that they had to send the productions back. That it was a poor fit, the tops were small they were stretched. 

Beyonce's Mom: Why would you….wait…wait…wait…Ok, we gonna cut that out. Why would you do that here. Cause you’re here to interview about the clothes, I mean in a positive way.  

Reporter: no it isn’t that…It doesn’t make any sense because I’m looking at the clothing… 

Beyonce's Mom: But I don’t wanna talk about that on the air (weave toss)

Jay-Z's Lyrics

When one of Jay-Z's records was played backwards recently, it said, in his voice, "6,6,6, murder Jesus." That's creepy and wrong.

Jay Gets B Drunk

He's such a positive influence on her (not). People commented how she was visibly drunk as she made her way into a car after a party.

Note to Beyonce: Christians aren't supposed to be getting drunk.

Beyonce Abandoned Former Bandmates While Lying That They Left

“When Beyonce abandoned her Destiny's Child bandmate. Singer Letoya Luckett claims she was heartbroken after leaving the group Destiny's Child because she felt abandoned by her band mates.

Washington, Sept 16: Singer Letoya Luckett claims she was heartbroken after leaving the group Destiny's Child because she felt abandoned by her band mates.

Six years ago LeToya was the fourth member of Destiny’s Child with original group members Beyoncé Knowles, Kelly Rowland and LaTavia Roberson.

But after a bust-up with the band manager and Beyoncé’s father Matthew Knowles in 2000, she and LaTavia were booted out of the group she had formed with her school friends.

"None of the girls called up after I left the group. What I missed most was the friendship Beyonce, Kelly and I had. We had met in elementary school so the hardest things were getting over birthday's and Christmases without them. I did call Beyonce on the New Years Eve of the new millennium,” Contactmusic quoted her as saying.

“I told her I missed her, I loved her and that it was a hard time. She called me three days later and told me things were over with the group and they were all going solo. But then there was another Destiny's Child album after that so I don't know what happened," she added.

LeToya finally took sweet revenge when her self titled solo album debuted at number one on the Billboard Hot 100 this summer.” (ANI) 

BAD JOURNALISM Roger Friedman 

Once again Roger Friedman is busy destroying any iota of credibility he had left. Have I not written in this Column before that Roger needs to be careful with the Hits Daily Double Chart because he doesn’t understand the premise behind it. Here’s a tissue Roger. Wipe the egg off your face, again:

On Tuesday, September 26, 2006 he wrote:

Believe it or not, Clay Aiken’s new album of schlocky tunes for blue-haired ladies, "A Thousand Different Ways," looks as though it just outsold Justin Timberlake’s "FutureSex/LoveSounds" and took the No. 1 spot. It was Aiken’s debut week and Justin’s second week. Weird, huh? 

On Wednesday, September 27, 2006 he wrote:

Justin Timberlake’s “FutureSex/LoveSounds” wound up beating Clay Aiken’s “A Thousand Different Ways” for No. 1 after all, but not by much — just about 25,000 copies.

Justin’s lucky there’s no recall vote. Nevertheless, Justin’s album was down 67 percent from its opening week, which means many buyers realized that most of the songs sound the same. Whoops!

Same thing for Beyonce, whose “B'Day” only sold 86,000 copies. And yet, none of this matters to the record companies involved, since all three CDs are under the Sony BMG umbrella. That’s what so great about having just four record companies left in the world: Sony BMG, Warner, Universal and Capitol EMI.

Speaking of Roger flip flopping, remember months ago in the Column how I wrote about him praising Paris Hilton's music. Now, months later, the record had flopped, he has retracted his glowing review. What, did Warner Bros' check bounce?

 “It could be that Simpson, like Paris Hilton, has finally oversaturated her market with style (so to speak) over substance. Hilton’s crummy debut album was hovering around No. 95 last night on Amazon. If Simpson, like Hilton, actually has tanked with this release, we can expect serious repercussions at her label, Epic, a division of Sony.” – Roger Friedman, September 5, 2006

Then he flip flopped some more and dissed her again on September 19, 2006:

Paris Hilton: No More Singing

"Well, it was a fun idea while it lasted. But Paris Hilton’s debut album has sold a paltry 120,000 copies. It’s already pretty much off the charts, too.

With new releases from Beyonce, Justin Timberlake, Janet Jackson and other big actual recording stars, Paris’ foray into the music business is about to become a Trivial Pursuit question.

However, the melody lingers on like bad fish. The costs on Paris are said to be ridiculously high, probably around $1 million considering travel, video and dog food. The album itself was also costly, with production fees usually seen on albums by — ahem — actual recording artists.

For Warner Bros., that’s not great news as they head into the fourth quarter. The label has no CDs with its name on it anywhere on the charts except for the Red Hot Chili Peppers’ now fallen recent album.

While competitors like Universal Music and Sony BMG barrel ahead with one Top 10 release after another, Warner Bros. remains stricken by a failure to launch.

The Paris disaster could signal a sea change at Warner among execs. I'm told by insiders that Warner Music Group overlord Lyor Cohen did not want to do Hilton's album, and that it was pushed by label chief Tom Whalley.

That jibes with what Paris herself said last winter when she gave this column an exclusive listen to her brand of anonymous Europop. She exclaimed: "Tom Whalley is really behind this. He thinks it's the greatest album."

As for dear Paris, a recording career was only one of many ways for her to market herself. She still has jewelry (designed by someone else), books (written by someone else) and drunk driving (that she does herself).

The strangest thing about Paris might be her publicist. Since John Lennon’s murder in 1980, Elliot Mintz has fashioned himself as Yoko Ono’s public barricade and keeper of the Lennon flame. It’s hard to imagine two clients less alike than Paris and Yoko. But in Hollywood, money talks, and that’s the bottom line." – September 19, 2006

LEGAL FILE Madonna Lawsuit

There are new developments and damning evidence in the case that I will post it next month. But for now:

The two unrelated computer security companies, one based in Florida and the other New York with offices all over the country, both specializing in computer data analysis and intrusion detection, were called out to my house by me on separate occasions and concluded the same thing, my computers are being severely hacked. This confirms what I alleged in my lawsuit against Madonna which also mentions that sick Kabbalah cult of hers, who have both been sued on different occasions by different people for disturbing cases of invasion of privacy and copyright theft.

Each computer specialist wrote on separate occasions last month, neither being told of the case or the other’s diagnosis of my computers, that my computers have unquestionably been “hacked” – one rating the hacks as “severe” and the other as “critical.”

Ironically, on the day one of the companies was called out to look at the system via a previously arranged field visit, the computer was hacked and the computer company security specialist got to witness the tail end of the hack, as Madonna’s commissioned hacker damaged the computer’s software to illegally get in the computer again for his daily hack and copy, then erased his trail – but not well enough, therefore it was detected.

The hack/incident has been extracted along with internal computer picture snapshots, with multiple copies stored for future use. I will post their reports about the computers, and other stunning evidence next month.

But the hacking continues. There was one so bad this week that Microsoft gave me the FBI's information and said I should report it to them because this is "constant invasion of privacy." Microsoft helped me correct the problem. However, with the sick level of determination this commission hacker is showing , it is only a matter of time before it happens again.

Trojan From New York Newspaper Found On My Computer

One of the computer security specialists installed a software program on my computer to search for Trojans that were giving the hacker continued, daily, full-scale access to my computer, creating errors in the software when it went online, then transmitting the contents to themselves and using it as I alleged she did in the lawsuit.

Said program found two Trojans, both from a well known New York newspaper. Ironically it is the very newspaper that I sent a formal complaint to the FBI about back in April of this year, as having printed a criminally obtained advance copy of my forthcoming book "50 Reasons Hollywood Stinks" changing it up a bit, printing it in the paper as a long article and attributing it to Madonna.

As I wrote in the Column previously, the advance copy of the book was obtained via breaking an entry and stealing a copy of it that was on CD ROM, straight off my desk. Then a week and a half after I called the Police and reported the burglary, filing a report when I'd noticed the discs were gone, the contents of one of the discs containing the unpublished book, mysteriously surfaced in that New York newspaper, attributed to none other than sick in the head Madonna. 

They are also one of the two newspaper that defamed and libeled me in October of 2005, the subject of another forthcoming lawsuit, in an attempt to discredit me and the case (because what Madonna has done and continues to do is very sick and criminal) via a planted article by Madonna and her ornery publicist Liz Rosenberg.

It's the same newspaper with the idiot gossip journalist that emailed me after hours to ask about the case, after the paper had already gone to print that evening, to be published the next day. Amazingly he managed to get a quote from Madonna's cantankerous publicist, though, which defamed me and lied about Madonna’s criminal conduct.

He wasn't interested in balanced reporting, as much as his pathetic paper with the circulation of a 100 year old likes to claim. He did not include any form of a quote from me as to my side of the story, also known as the truth, as previous and new evidence being uncovered each month is showing more and more that that sick woman did all this stuff she's being accused of and stupidly still has not stopped.

He did that deliberately to give the appearance of being fair via the email, not realizing the email he sent me inquiring about the case contained the time he sent it out, which clearly showed it was after they had gone to print. Therefore, they had no intention of getting my side of the story, being fair or balanced, they wanted to defame and discredit me by any means necessary, in a piece undoubtedly sponsored by the media obsessed Madonna, whose career only exists in weekly faxed and emailed, placed articles in publications, which is pathetic.

What they did constituted several felonies in publishing that ripped off version of my book that they illegally obtained. 

This to me is the most amazing part. How absolutely dirty the entertainment industry is and how many people have gotten involved in her sick conduct. That says something very awful about you. Anyone who would get involved in that mess or make excuses for her despicable, criminal conduct, is him or herself a rotten human being. Full stop.

My father always taught me that truth and justice is more important than being popular (or in this case bribed). Because at the end of the day, if you participate in or defend reprehensible conduct, you yourself will be deemed a person of bad character and a reprobate as well and history will record you as such.

But it is very clear, the questionable, cowardly head of the FBI, Robert Mueller, and his look the other way to serious crime approach if it is committed by the rich and famous (albeit the thieving rich and famous) to the case, is what is giving them the confidence and bold face arrogance to continue in the criminal hacking my computers to copy newer copyrights and engage in other criminal misconduct, ONE WHOLE YEAR after his office signed for the package containing the formal complaint and lawsuit about the case.

While the Miami office of the FBI accepted the case and said they are "investigating it" (at least they did something, unlike their boss) they can't risk going beyond publishing in their report what corrupt Robert Mueller tells them they can or they will get into trouble with headquarters, be demoted or  lose their jobs for telling the truth.

When they found horrific misconduct on her part, and I know they did, because if we found all this stuff that will be posted on the site soon, I know they found some foul stuff, but aren't making it public.

I will post more of the damning evidence next month, but Mueller's handling of this matter says one of two things about Robert Mueller:

a.) He is ineffective, doesn't know his head from his butt, and can't investigate jack. Because if I, as a private citizen can find all this stuff and hire people who have further uncovered stuff, and he hasn't, what does that say about him? Really, he would have to be the bumbling equivalent of the Pink Panther mixed with Leslie Neilson's character in The Naked Gun. And this is the man in charge of national security.


b.) He is sitting on or has destroyed evidence in the case pointing to serious crimes being committed by Madonna and co, crimes that continue to this day, prolonging this ordeal for me and my family and endangering us. Once again, do take note, this is the man in charge of national security.  

While I do think he is an idiot as mentioned in "a," it's definitely "b."

Is Madonna Insane...Or Working On A Insanity Defense...Or Both

Criminals Who Wear Robes Publicly




Vincent "The Chin" Gigante Madonna "The Botox" Ciccone

Madonna was caught wandering around on a public street in her bathrobe and slippers with her typical deranged look on her face. When I saw this pic on a web site, I immediately remembered another Mafioso, Vince Gigante, who did the exact same thing in New York, which the Feds interpreted as a ruse to dodge pending incarceration for serious criminal misconduct. 

"In the 1980s Vincent "Chin" Gigante was a familiar sight on Sullivan Street in Greenwich Village ...the middle-aged man was often seen wandering around in his pajamas, robe, and slippers with a cap pulled down over his head. He would mumble to himself as he shuffled along. Usually he showed a few days growth of beard on his sagging, expressionless face."

He and Madonna have so much in common! (LOL) The only thing missing is the beard...only Guy Ritchie is her beard, while she pines for Ingrid Caseres and Rosie in homodom.

Rod Stewart Slams Madonna

"ROD STEWART claims MADONNA has done well to become a global superstar, because he doesn't rate her voice. The rocker insists the MATERIAL GIRL is over-rated and has succeeded because of hype and luck. He says, "I'm not a great lover of Madonna's voice. She's done very well with what she's got. She's not my favourite singer." - Contact Music

Guy Ritchie's Film Company Suffers Over $100,000 In Losses

Mrs. Madonna, fellow Kabbalah accomplice, without the decency to do the right thing and turn the witch in.

Guy Ritchie in a little girlie outfit Madonna made him his own premiere. No, it doesn’t look gay at all...:

Guy Ritchie when he had a career before she ruined it:

"Los Angeles, CA (BANG) - Guy Ritchie's film company has come to a crashing halt after producing a few unsuccessful movies in recent years. Ritchie's company lost over $126,000 last year alone. As a result, the director has decided to take a break.

Ska Films - the company behind Guy's hit productions "Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels" and "Snatch" - suffered the losses after it failed to produce any successful films in the last two years.” - All Headline News

Madonna's Cross Stunt Was A Bad Idea

She really isn't very smart. I saw a program by a preacher and he brought her up briefly, referring to her as someone with a "reprobate mind" as the Bible phrase goes. He also brought up the unwise idea of her undertaking that cross stunt and so many times. I knew the Bible verse he was making reference to and immediately realized what he meant.

The Bible says people who hang on a cross are "cursed" (Galatians 3:13). When Jesus did this, it was to be the substitute for our sins, as He himself had committed no sin. Other people hanging on crosses in the manner she did is not a good idea, as it will bring trouble and misfortune in their lives, as they are not sinless.

Therefore, she has brought something spiritual, negative, in her life that will only bring her misfortune. It was a stupid idea and she did this many nights on tour to her own detriment. I don't know why some people got riled up about it, as she is the one who is going to suffer misfortune for it and it is richly deserved. 

She gave an interview recently responding to the criticism and mocking she was receiving for said stunt and she twisted the Bible in a weak attempt to defend her actions. She quoted the Bible where Jesus said, "Pick up your cross and follow me."

Notice He didn't say hang on your cross and follow me.

"Pick up your cross and follow me" means making sacrifices to help others and preach the Gospel. It means self-denial, sharing what you have, helping the less fortunate, becoming a good person and changing your wicked ways - none of which Madonna does. That's what the symbol of the cross means in that verse. Not hanging on it in blaspheme as she has.  

"Madonna decided to respond to all the criticism, saying in a statement that putting herself up on the cross "is no different than a person wearing a cross or 'taking up the cross' as it says in the Bible - TMZ

"If Jesus Were Alive Today He'd Also Be Charging $250 For Decent Seats" - Defamer

"Combining Christian iconography with spattered human blood, or urine, or elephant dung, or almost anything else distasteful, has become such a common pop-culture gimmick that the practice has lost most of its shock value. Madonna was more mocked than raged against over her current bid for attention, an on-stage appropriation of the Christian crucifixion." -

Article About Madonna's Greed And Pillaging Of Minority Cultures

She has gotten rich off of black and latinos backs and could care less about either. She is a complete hypocrite and poser: 

"Before spraying one's hair, any he-man must go Under the Dryer—the name of a pesky blog which provocatively says  MADONNA should pay for the expenses of late voguer Ann Richards, I mean Willi Ninja. As was just vented there, "Madonna owes the voguing community a huge debt and the least she could do is step up and pay Willi's remaining medical bills and see to his mother's continued care."

It says she "pimped her way" to stardom "on the backs of African American, Latino, and gay cultures . . . She would have nothing including  LOURDES without black and brown people. (Madonna was quite public about seeking out a Latino to father her first child.)" There are several intellectual leaps in this argument that I'm not taking—not without liquids—but it's food for thought, and at least it ends with the more realistic suggestion that Madge can maybe just do a benefit concert." – Village Voice

Madonna's Make Over Bombs

"It's a man, baby!":

Who knew yellow teeth and yellow hair wouldn't be a hit:

1. Sorry Madonna, we don't likey this new look. – pop sugar

2. She looks like an extra in The Matrix. Griffin73 Tue

3. yuck poor madge! sheetal215

4. Oh no, that looks AWFUL. Did she lighten it too? The color makes her look so washed out.

5. Very early 90's no likey. LolaLemonpout

6. Sharon Stone's twin? JennaV Tue

7. LOL Griffin, she most definitely does. I'm thinking this cut might be a bit more flattering on her if it wasn't that bleached out blonde colour. I don't hate the look, I just don't love it. Ugh, I'm fence sitting again. kidcrazy2 Tue

8. Her teeth and her hair are the same color now. rachel5476

9. that looks like a really cheap wig. And the woman makes so much money, yet she can bleach her teeth?  OhMy_SeeingStars  

10. wow...that's really bad...sashak

11. She looks really old. Me no likey.

12. She's just getting old. Time to hang it up Madge. You can never be replaced. allthingspop

13.  no madonna no! I like the cut, but not on you. DesignRchic

14. Sometime it better to retire while you still can. Griffin73

15. She looks like Sharon Stone. skinny fat

16. Retire, or fly to Mars. Either one would do at this point. kidcrazy2

17. i hate the new hair but i love how she's always changing her look. better luck next time, madge! bluejeanie

18. I think she looks better than in the 70's wig she'd been sporting for a while...Shiloh Jolie Pitt

19.  Poor Madonna can not fight the aging process anymore.. ohsuri

20. what I don't like about her look these days is her clothes. I don't get it. Not flattering--you'd think with all the work that she does to get the body she has, she'd do it up a little better in the wardrobe dept. merryunbirthday

21. Still ugly like always. She does have a killer bod, but you would never know it when she wears this kind of crap. radarkitty

22. ewwwwwww! lovely

23. Madonna in the past ROCKED. Now she is an old lady trying to hang in there. ohsuri

24. She is not again well. Thanks to diet and exercise, her body is great, but that's about the only good thing I can say. LoneWolf

25. cute cut-- bad face to have it on...LaurenG22

26. Is her hair made of straw? Griffin73

27. *aging* LoneWolf's

28. Um, ew. Why would she do this? She must be drunk. MissRobinson

29. whats with the yellow teeth? BlondeSugar Tue, 09/19/2006

30. I agree Lauren! The cut is super cute, but it's not flattering on her....merryunbirthday

Madonna Stealing Haircuts From The Internet...Again. Internet Feedback from ONTD:

1. sup same haircut? [info]blondie786

2. only difference is you look good! [info]hunniebunz

3. and she probably paid a bunch of money for hers, whereas mine is razor cut in my apartment bathroom [info]blondie786

4. You pull it off though because you're probably 30 years younger than Madge and you have some color to your skin and your teeth are white. [info]spinylobster

5. cut looks way too young for her. you fail again you old whore. [info]jamcake

6. She is SUCH an ugly, untalented, unoriginal *****. England, plz keep her and spare us Americans. We're sorry about our revolution, we're sorry about all those times we said that Churchill looked like a newborn baby. Just keep Madonna AWAY from us. [info]bellichka

7. I hate this whore. lovedhurtlost

8. iawtc. [info]greaterthankate

9.iawtc [info]cacaballbutt

10. you know there's a problem when her hair color matching her teeth isnt even the worst part of the photo. [info]ilikeandrewbird

11. haha. [info]eemjaye

12. Didn't notice that until I read your post.  That's just all kinds of wrong. papayakiller

13. I didn't notice that either.. I had to go back and look. [info]cheap

14. hair colour = teeth colour. that was the first thing i noticed about her. [info]i_nemesis

15. I was about to post about the yellow teeth, but I didn't make the association with the hair colour. You're so right. [info]demented_21

16. Wow, those age lines are really starting to show up. I wish she'd just embrace the fact that she's an older woman and stop trying to act like a poptart. [info]rinakshi

17. I like that the hair and the teeth are yellow. Hot. She has all the money in the world, but nothing can stop the fug from creeping through now that she's old.[info]neo_oblivion

18. whats her natural hair color? [info]kevinzegers

19. Really dark brown - ever see the "Like a Prayer" video? [info]foreverdiva

20. dark brown  [info]whisperthewords

21. grey [info]hunniebunz

22. lol [info]kindafunnysad

23. Dark brown... she's an Italian girl. [info]bellichka

24. Yeah. Doesn't bother me. Unless she unzips her hoodie to unveil a  leotard. I can't handle any more of that.[info]lovenoelg

25. lol [info]androganus

26. she looks like a man [info]heavenli_ee

27. GET A TAN, MADGE.[info]okiedohkiepokie

28. She needs to go back to made her look 30 years younger, and didn't make her horrible face stick out. [info]juniper

29. her eyebrows bug me [info]metalygirl

30. m2 m2. they look like long skinny caterpillars. there is no shape to]ilost_themoon

31. DOWNGRADE! [info]brenden

32. eeeew [info]xnotlikeyoux

33. this is truly one of THE most disturbing things I've seen all year. I hope she gets mauled for it in the press. It really is horrific. [info]kyoto19

34. I like that the hair and the teeth are yellow. Hot. [info]neo_oblivion

35. Why platinum blonde, haven't you re-invented yourself enough Maddy? [info]h_hrlova

36. hmm. now both her hair & her teeth have a yellowish tint ..[info]__narcisistic

37. wasn't she terrifying enough already? info]mzpoggio

38. ahhhhhhh  hhhh hhh haahaha.[info]bohemiancouture

39. My nan has that hairdo.[info]coralfangeffect

40. i dont get the obsession with madonna. i hate her. [info]tila123

41. I would like it if it was alot darker. And on the teeth, EWW. [info]23bucks_an_hour

42. HAHAHAHAHA [info]aurosan

43. F U G, forever FUG - [info]cacaballbutt

44. it looks like a wig. not flattering to her face shape. [info]ilost_themoon

45. Don't mind the color so much as the cut. Ugh. Not good. [info]kimonthejourney

46. Sir. [info]clever_zomboid

47. I never could understand why rich people spent so much only to make their hair look fake and unhealthy...[info]zinnia_ziegler

48. One word. Ew. [info]promisemewings

49. It looks like a wig, but her face has eased into that brow-lift a bit. [info]seefangy

50. What was she thinking? She must be on crack. [info]_musicfreak_

51. *cries* It's not that bad though, but still horrible. [info]freshnfunky

52. That had better be a wig. One side is longer than the other. [info]entelodont

53. that was so not the thing to see right after eating lunch =/ [info]such_resilience

54. ha, her hair's the same colour as her teeth now. [info]twiddledum

55. fug [info]pattyg_baby

56. Halloween aint til next month, Madge.[info]sweetnitanitro

57. yuk shes old and ugly. [info]crazy_angel1986

58. Man, her teef are brown. [info]cerulean

59. Madonna's new incarnation: soccer mom. [info]runnerlevelred

60. BriteSmile. [info]mad_turtle

61. She looks so old in that pic. Nope, not good at all. :P [info]maldeluxx

62. That's awful. She looks like a man. [info]schexyschteve

63. she looks buhbad![info]robotdeer

64. i dont like it at all. [info]harliquingrrl

65. shes disgusting. [info]louisvincent

66. I don't like it. The color isn't good for her skin tone.[info]boganvillia

67. she looks like a moron. [info]palmer4prez

68. she looks rough! [info]alien_toes

69. Forget the hair. She needs to worry about changing that space in-between her teeth. [info]_chiller

Madonna And Guy Want To Adopt African Twins

Wow, I wasn't aware the criminally insane were allowed to adopt. People from a sick, dangerous cult adopting kids, while decent people struggle to. How ironic.

She’s such a publicity whore. Angelina Jolie’s getting all the attention and the nut can’t stand it:

"Madonna and Guy: Would a 'sellotape baby' bring them closer together?

Deep in prayer and contemplation, the moneyed Beverly Hills disciples of the Kabbalah sect were recently stirred from their meditation by the faint but unmistakable sound of snoring.

Hunched in his seat at their meeting, his unshaven chin on his chest and a white trucker's cap pulled down over his face, was the familiar figure of Guy Ritchie, clearly enjoying forty winks.

His unscheduled nap (he was suffering the effects of jetlag and a particularly physical jujitsu wrestling session) was greeted by good-natured grins from his fellow worshippers.

All, that is, except one. His wife Madonna. According to those present, she refused to crack a smile.

None of which is particularly surprising given the singer's famed devotion to the mystical offshoot of Judaism, and, it must be said, rumours of her film director husband's cooling towards the faith.

Indeed, such is his boredom at the Kabbalah prayer sessions they attend that he is said to have taken to passing the time checking out the beautiful women who flock to the cult's Los Angeles branch.

Not the sort of behaviour that is likely to improve the Queen of Pop's notoriously short temper, or, for that matter, put to rest continued nagging doubts about the state of their marriage - doubts which will be intensified by claims that the couple have fallen out over the education of their children.

At the same time, and just as Madonna's controversial world tour draws to a close, there comes another rumour.

The jungle drums of Hollywood are beating that, in a final attempt to save their marriage, the Ritchies are considering adopting a child…

Nor, it has to be said, since Madonna celebrated her 48th birthday last month, is time on her side.

The star's inability to conceive has been, say friends, a source of strain between her and Ritchie, whose 1998 gangster hit Lock Stock And Two Smoking Barrels once made him the enfant terrible of British film.

At ten years younger than his more famous wife, Guy is, according to friends, desperate to become a father again.

Guy was also absent from the family's U.S. holiday last month (the Material Girl and the children enjoyed a four-day break in Miami), preferring to stay home alone at their 1,200-acre Wiltshire estate.

As far back as February, the couple were pictured looking miserable together as she collected a Best International Female gong at the Brits. Little wonder, then, that there has been speculation that the marriage might not survive.

But friends say that while at first she found her husband's fondness for drinking beer with his cronies in a smoky bar charmingly British, she soon tired of it.

When she did join him, she would insist on taking along her own &pound150 bottle of Krug Rose champagne.

Simply put, she has grown tired of slumming it - particularly as Guy is prone tunelessly to belt out Irish folk songs when drunk.

No surprise, then, that she is said to have issued an edict limiting her husband's drinking sessions to no more than three pints twice a week, and told him he has to be home by 11pm.

The domineering singer put her diktat into action at a pre-Oscars party thrown by chef Jamie Oliver at New York's Soho House when she was overheard instructing Ritchie to leave his pint and forbidding him from ordering another round from the bar.

His love of beer and evenings out with the boys has led to him putting on weight, which in turn leads to him snoring at night - a habit, say his friends, that results in him being thrown out of bed by his wife.

For his part, Guy is said to hate the strict macrobiotic diet Madonna insists the family eats and frequently incurs her wrath by bringing home chocolate for the children.

Given this background, it is perhaps understandable that some are already questioning if, with their talk of adoption, the couple are planning a "Sellotape baby".

…At the same time, Ritchie's career has gone into freefall following a string of flops, including the truly awful Swept Away - which starred his wife and went straight to video - and last year's critically-mauled Revolver.

He is now pinning his hopes on another gangster film, called Static, which he is trying to get made in America:


1. So Madonna wants to adopt a baby from Africa does she? What about adopting a baby from the countless children's homes in this country? Are there not children here that need kind and loving homes... this is what really annoys me. - Hayley Mcnulty, Luton, Beds

2. Couldn't agree more, people always ignore the charity and good causes that need to be done in Britain and always look to some far flung country such as africa. And they shouldnt pay some adoption agency a load of money, they could adopt 2 or 3 children in england at a fraction of the cost - Joanna, bath, England

3. If their marriage is on the rocks then adopting a child is one of the cruellest things they could do. Sellotape babies don't save marriages, they just get stuck into a mess that's already there. Think again Madge please. - Kate, Haywards Heath, UK

4. I totally agree with Hayley's comment, they might not get a 10page spread in OK magazine for adopting a 4yr old white child from Hackney! - Nikki, Northern Ireland

5. Since when did children start arriving with 'adhesive' written on them? Children are not glue! - Louise Terrien, Redon, France

6. If they find any children on mars she'll have one of them as well. Mothercare should open a pick and mix department. - M, Coventry - The Daily Mail

Madonna Article In Russian Newspaper Refers To Her As "Young" (LOL)

Madonna was referred to as a “young woman” in a Russian article, which sent the internet laughing on multiple web sites. Maybe something was lost in translation? Otherwise, she wrote that article herself. There is nothing wrong with aging, but there is something wrong with lack of self-awareness.

Madonna, young? Witch, you can collect social security.

Article quote: "The United States first destroyed our great country, the Soviet Union, then they destroyed our economy and now they are sending this horrible young woman to destroy our souls" 

Feedback from Oh No They Didn't: 

1. "The United States first destroyed our great country, the Soviet Union, then they destroyed our economy and now they are sending this horrible young woman to destroy our souls," 

Best quote ever! But in what freakish hell dimension is Madonna, like, young? [info]disgracelands

2. YOUNG woman?! Oh, you poor Russians, all those magical rain-killing chemicals have destroyed your eyesight.[info]entelodont 

3. She only likes Moscow cos they call her a 'young lady'. [info]lovenoelg

4. ahahahha))) !!thats the best [info]e_motion_s

5. bad quality and madonna go hand in hand anyway. don't worry.[info]whaturmamasaid

6. go away madge...[info]h_hrlova

7. I checked out a copy of her first album and she's on the cover (of course), but it made me realize how much plastic surgery she's had. [info]runnerlevelred

8. she would. [info]degrassi4life

9. now they are sending this horrible young woman to destroy our souls. um... SHE IS NOT YOUNG! She is Like older than my mom. carinn 

10. Madonna is boring now. [info]123girl

11. Ugh, what a vile woman.  [info]aurosan

12. I've got no hate for people making money, and I love it when performers reinvent themselves so they can continue to work. But please... the Jesus thing has been done *yawn*. Find another religion to insult. [info]kristinbrandis

13. madonna technically belongs to the UK now. We Americans will not take responsibility for her anymore. Hahaha. [info]critical_jim

14. Great! That old whore can go and annoy the piss out of the Russians. "..horrible young woman.." ahahahaha! [info]jimb

15. Madonna must have gone through a box of Depends pissing with joy between this comment and the crazy old priest's bomb threats. ***** must think she hit the relevancy lotto.[info]mondragona

LEGAL FILE Robert Mueller (FBI)

FBI Being Unfavorably Compared To M15

The American press has been unfavorably comparing the FBI to Mi5. While Mi5 and Mi6 are great, lets give the FBI some credit. They do have some extraordinary investigators, agents and analysts (the director of the FBI excluded of course).

To be fair, an agent did suspect something was wrong with Moussaoui and 70 times requested to investigate him (70 TIMES!). Call it investigator's intuition, but he couldn't get clearance from headquarters to do so (70 TIMES!).

Then there is the Italian agent of "Donnie Brasco" fame that infiltrated the mafia and saw enough stuff to substantiate many indictments, which helped the government. That was incredible. More recently, an agent out of New York, a Latino, infiltrated the mafia again to the point of getting made.

Side bar: The FBI keeps running the same play and the mafia falls for it every time…

Anyway, so it's not that the talent isn't there - it is - but too much bureaucracy, red tape and bad leadership is clouding it (Aisha looks at Mueller). Let’s hope that stops.   

I have a question, is every agent a special agent. Are none of them regular or newbie. Just kidding.   

Maybe FBI headquarters needs to learn to listen to their agents more. Just because you are headquarters, doesn't mean you are better or smarter than the field office agents (heck, Robert "signed off on a wonky computer system the budget of a third world nation" Mueller proved that one single-handedly). 

What's surprising is that Robert Mueller went to Harvard (yes, really). Harvard's a great school, but I don't know what happened this time. Harvard's turned out many accomplished men.

Oh wait  -Aisha remembers Harvard turned out the Unabomber -. Never mind. 8 out of 10 ain't bad.

Just kidding. No disrespect intended to Harvard or the Unabomber.

Being Jamaican and of British decent, I was always reading and hearing about British intelligence and British international spies in the news and via British exported entertainment. And as much as it was for dramatic effect at times and made for intriguing entertainment, you still knew it was real and they exist.

That’s something I fault Mueller for. Under his direction, they don’t spy on foreign enemies enough and spy on Americans too much.

I guess that's the CIA’s job, but the FBI would be good at it, as their agents have an uncanny ability of blending into places and situations that is not their normal element (mafia, ect).

They aren’t like the movie Men in Black, stoic, in black suits with Raybands on, so you can see them coming a mile away. They wear normal clothes and come from different cultural backgrounds (Latin, European, Asian, Middle Eastern) and could use that to their advantage in international surveillance -cough- spying. They look quite normal, actually.

If you saw an FBI agent in a restaurant, in the mall or on the street, you probably wouldn’t know, because they surprisingly look just like everyone else. Even the head of the FBI for the Miami office,  was in the paper last week, and doesn’t look like what the general public’s stereotype of an FBI agent is. I’ve seen pics of other agents in periodicals and it’s the same.

So, they have things going for them. They could use that unobtrusiveness to help infiltrate international groups that are a threat to the country.

While the CIA certainly does a lot of international work, I’ve seen pics of CIA agents online and they sometimes look the part.

Having written that…Mueller still stinks.

Why doesn’t he visit the Miami field office and give the people of Miami one of his bloviated speeches. So I can greet him at the airport with a “you suck” sign. Yea, like I’d go all the way out to the airport just for that…when I can just write it on here. Yes, I believe in efficiency and time saving, something Mueller has no use for.

Robert Mueller rhymes with Ferris Bueller…and they have something in common...they’re both “off.”

"Hill Panels Discuss FBI Changes for Better Intelligence Gathering"

(AXcess News) Washington - Two congressional committees scrutinized the FBI Thursday, asking how it has changed since Sept. 11 and whether law enforcement and domestic intelligence-gathering duties should be in separate agencies.

FBI Director Robert Mueller defended the law enforcement agency to a House appropriations subcommittee, telling the chairman, Rep. Frank Wolf, R-Va., the media has ignored improvements in its national security operations.

"The job is not finished," he said, noting that the FBI's primary focus changed after the Sept. 11 attacks to expanding its domestic intelligence capabilities.

But Wolf said the bureau has a history of secrecy and needs to disclose more information.

"That's why the bureau needs to tear down the curtains," Wolf said, noting the Bush administration's tendency to keep mum. "Being secretive isn't the best idea in the world."

The chairman also recommended that the FBI begin a pilot program to hire recent college graduates as agents. But Mueller said he wants only agents with real-world experience.

The average age of new employees at the bureau is 30, and applicants must be at least 23.

The hearing focused on the bureau's National Security Branch, a domestic intelligence unit established last year. 

Richard Thornburgh, chair of the FBI Transformation Panel and a former U.S. attorney general, told the subcommittee the agency has "overcome many obstacles" since he was appointed to the position four years ago.

"You can't change an organization of this size and this history and this tradition overnight," he said.

According to the FBI Web site, the number of intelligence analysts working for the bureau has doubled to more than 2,100 since the Sept. 11 attacks.

Asked about creating new domestic intelligence agency to replace the FBI's intelligence efforts, Thornburgh called it a "silver bullet."

"I think it's a quick fix that wouldn't fix the problem," he said.

But at a Senate appropriations subcommittee earlier in the day, two legal experts and a former British counterterrorism official recommended a new domestic intelligence agency be created without law enforcement capabilities.

U.S. Circuit Judge Richard Posner told Sen. Judd Gregg, R-N.H., the committee chair, that catching terrorists is difficult for the FBI because its agents must obtain warrants from special courts - slowing the process.

"It isn't designed to monitor people who are terrorists," he said, adding that the FBI should become more like Scotland Yard, Britain's domestic law-enforcement agency, and  a new agency should be created to deal with domestic intelligence.

Posner said he wouldn't want an agency with constitutional immunity, but a one that would be nimble enough to obtain and dissect information quickly.

He said the FBI would react too quickly to potential threats, citing the seven "homegrown terrorists" who were arrested in Miami in June.

"Don't arrest those jokers in Miami," he said. "Use them, play with them. Maybe we can learn more about international terrorism."

John Yoo, a law professor at the University of California, Berkeley, said the FBI focuses too much on catching criminals and not on preventing crime. He called for a "proactive" approach to domestic intelligence similar to MI5, the British domestic intelligence agency that has no law enforcement power.

Tom Parker, a former British counterterrorism official, agreed.

"Arguably, this allows those tasked with counterterrorism to focus on gathering intelligence, engage in long-term monitoring and investigation and develop expertise on the enemy that may go beyond what is possible in a domestic law enforcement system," Parker said in a written statement.

Sen. Robert Byrd, D-W.Va., warned the committee that adopting domestic spying techniques similar to Britain's would eventually lead to an erosion of civil liberties.

"The true danger is when liberty is nibbled away," he said, quoting 18th century British statesman Edmund Burke.

The American Civil Liberties Union also warning that adopting British counterterrorism strategies could endanger civil liberties.

"British authorities have the power to detain individual without charge for up to 30 days," it said in a statement, "a power that flies in the face of our Constitution."

Parker said there are many protections for civil liberties for terrorism suspects in Britain, including a human rights court chaired by European judges who oversee counterterrorism practices in Britain. - Source: Scripps Howard Foundation

Speaking of "detain individual without charge for up to 30 days" may be it wouldn't be such a bad idea here.

"Minneapolis FBI Chief Shipped Back To Washington"

Not a comforting thought considering this is the FBI office I got that letter from two months ago about them finding my info was compromise via computer intrusion. You guys need to stop fighting each other and fight Mueller, um, I mean the terrorists:

"MINNEAPOLIS - The head of the Minneapolis FBI office, Michael Tabman, has been temporarily sent back to Washington as the bureau conducts an internal inquiry into "an ongoing internal administrative matter," a spokesman said Friday.

Minneapolis FBI spokesman Paul McCabe wouldn't provide details of the investigation or who it involves. He said the FBI has sent an inspector to the Minneapolis office to determine the facts. - Associated Press - Fri, Sep. 22, 2006

"Head of Minneapolis FBI office reassigned for 30 days"

The move apparently came after he reassigned a star agent after they argued.

The head of the Minneapolis FBI office, Michael Tabman, has been reassigned temporarily because of an accusation that he punished a star agent in the pre-Sept. 11, 2001, investigation of Zacarias Moussaoui, a government source said Friday.

Minneapolis FBI agent Harry Samit, who accused headquarters supervisors of "criminal negligence" in their handling of the Moussaoui case, is charging that Tabman reassigned him because he pressed to speak at a public forum, the source said.

The FBI, in a terse statement that made no mention of Samit, acknowledged Tabman's reassignment "to avoid any appearance of a conflict of interest. "This is an internal administrative matter, and it would be inappropriate for the FBI to comment on the specifics of the situation," the statement said. "The FBI has sent an inspector to the Minneapolis field office to determine the facts. It is important to note that until the internal inquiry is complete, no conclusions can or should be made."

The source said that Samit and Tabman apparently argued about who would speak at a national security forum on the Moussaoui case at the William Mitchell College of Law on Sept. 12. John Radsan, a William Mitchell law professor who organized the forum, initially circulated fliers stating that Samit would appear, along with chief prosecutor Robert Spencer and lead defense lawyer Edward MacMahon.

But sometime in August, Radsan substituted Tabman's name for Samit's. Tabman had no involvement in the investigation and arrived in Minneapolis in 2005, long after Moussaoui's arrest while learning to fly a 747 jumbo jet at an Eagan flight school.

Shortly after the argument, the source said, Samit was reassigned from the counterterrorism unit, where he has spent most of his seven years as a FBI special agent. Samit then complained to FBI headquarters, which apparently led to Tabman's 30-day removal from his position, the source said.

Reached at his office, Samit declined to comment on Friday.

Samit, a former naval intelligence officer, has drawn wide praise for his tenacious investigative work on the Moussaoui case in the weeks before the Sept. 11 attacks. He was the lead FBI agent in Moussaoui's Aug. 16, 2001, arrest, after the now-convicted Al-Qaida operative aroused suspicions while at the flight school.

Samit was a key witness for both sides at Moussaoui's death-penalty trial last spring --the only U.S. prosecution stemming from the Sept. 11 attacks. During his testimony, Samit described how he quickly became convinced that Moussaoui was a terrorist and sent more than 70 communications to Washington in pursuit of a warrant to search Moussaoui's belongings -- a request that was never granted. A search after the attacks turned up clues to the terror plot.

In his testimony, Samit acknowledged making scathing remarks about headquarters supervisors' handling of the case.

Tabman, a native New Yorker who joined the FBI in 1983, has been special agent in charge in Minneapolis since January 2005. Two months later, he oversaw the bureau's investigation at the Red Lake Indian Reservation, where a high school student fatally shot nine people before killing himself. Before coming to Minneapolis, Tabman spent two years as an inspector for the FBI.

Tabman has been temporarily replaced in Minneapolis by the FBI's special agent in charge from San Antonio. - Star Tribune

Mueller Slammed In Another Publication

“According to FBI director Robert Mueller, the Bureau is in fine shape. "We have expanded our mission, radically overhauled our intelligence programs and capabilities, and have undergone tremendous personnel growth," he told Congress in May.

I'm not sure what FBI he's talking about. The one I know still uses analysts -- the people who are supposed to connect the dots -- to take out trash and answer telephones, gives new agents more time for vacation than counterterrorism training, and wasted nearly $200 million on a computer case file system that still doesn't work.” - Courier Journal

New Doco Includes Mueller Denial That Is Being Questioned

"The new documentary 9/11 Press for Truth premiered on September 10th in Washington, DC. The film played at the nearly packed Landmark E Street Cinema just around the corner from FBI headquarters. While the irony was not intentional, it was clearly appropriate.

In the film’s first five minutes, we hear FBI Director Robert Mueller tell us that the agency simply had no idea that terrorists would ever use planes to attack the United States. Apparently, he also had no idea that one of his top agents sent reports of suspicious Middle Eastern men in commercial flight schools well before 9/11. He had no idea that a 1996 plot was foiled involving the use of planes as weapons against the United States.

He also forgot that at the G8 conference of world leaders in Italy just before 9/11, defenses were set up to meet the threat of airplanes used as weapons. This sequencing in the film typifies the skillful presentation of information and themes throughout 9/11 Press for Truth. -  “Scoop” Independent News, Washington, DC 9/11/06

Is Hoover's COINTELPRO Still Being Utilized Today

It was a civil rights and Constitution violating piece of nastiness from the mind of Hoover that harmed many people in this country that he deemed too influential. So, is it still in use. Just asking.

Bank Robber 'Taunts' FBI

Oh when they catch this guy. Dude, I see a plunger in your future (I'm just kidding):

The FBI is even more eager to find an armed robber who has hit five banks. They say he's very dangerous and cocky. The FBI thinks he's taunting them.

When the FBI looked at surveillance photos from inside that bank they say they felt like the suspect was taunting them.

He wore a baseball hat with the FBI logo on it. When he stormed in to the bank he shouted: "FBI! FBI! Put your hands up!" the FBI thinks he is trying to send them a message.

“We would in turn like to send a message right back to him,” said Special Agent Emmett. “We're coming to get you. You will be arrested,” he said.

A witness described the suspect getaway vehicle as a late 90’s or early 2000 model silver Jeep Cherokee. It has a red pin-stripe on the side and a partial Georgia tag. The first three letters are either “A-Q-K” or “Q-A-K”.

After the latest robbery, a dye-pack exploded in the Jeep Cherokee. If you know where it is or know who the suspect is, call the FBI at 404-679-9000. - 11Alive

Someone turn this guy in and to the local police, cause if not, he may get plunged into oblivion for doing that stuff (kidding again).

"The Case of the Missing Maps"

"In prestigious libraries around the world, dozens of rare maps—often hundreds of years old—were mysteriously disappearing one by one without a trace. The thefts went unsolved—and in most cases, undetected—for more than seven years.

Until one day last June when a quick-thinking Yale librarian turned up the culprit.

Here’s how it happened: one morning, the head of public services for Yale University’s Beinecke Library in New Haven, Connecticut, happened to spot an X-Acto knife blade on the floor. It made the librarian nervous, of course—especially since she found the blade in the rare documents room of the library.

Instantly, she looked around and noticed a man in the stacks. “I can get his name from our sign-in register,” she thought. She found it: Edward Forbes Smiley III. On a hunch, she searched the Internet to see if his name came up. It did. Smiley was a well-known rare maps dealer. Mmmm, suspicious. The librarian called security, and it wasn’t long before Smiley was caught red-handed with seven maps, including a nearly 500-year-old treasure worth more than $150,000. He was arrested on the spot.

Yale officials suspected that Smiley had targeted other map collections and that he might have sold some of his “finds” overseas. So they called us. They were right: Smiley admitted stealing and selling 97 rare maps from numerous collections worldwide over the course of seven years. Their total value? An estimated $3 million.

Success! After much painstaking work, we’ve recovered 86 of the maps. We couldn’t have done it, though, without the help of our law enforcement partners in the case: the Boston Police Department, Yale and Harvard university police departments, the New York Public Library Security Division, and Scotland Yard." - FBI

"FBI Agent Says Bureau Failed Her After Illness"

Special Agent Theresa Foley

Mueller could at least send the woman some flowers. They should help her get back on her feet since she got sick in the line of duty. She should get her job back as well. It clearly means a lot to her. Poor lady, that's gotta be tough.

Side bar: her name is Foley, like Axl Foley from Beverly Hills Cop.

Foley Said She Got Sick While On Duty

BOSTON -- An FBI agent says the bureau has abandoned her as she fights a disease contracted while on assignment in Cuba.

NewsCenter 5's David Boeri reported that Theresa Foley said she's in a fight against the bureau and to regain her health.

Foley is an FBI agent who volunteered for duty at Guantanamo Bay in Cuba three years ago.

"I went down to Guantanamo to work. I signed off knowing it would be a year of my life. I thanked God for the opportunity," Foley said.

But now, Foley said she can barely walk and has undergone spinal fusion and surgery because of a bacterial disease called leptosporosis. The disease is transmitted by rat urine, which Foley said infested the living quarters to which she was assigned at Guantanamo.

"Due to the heavy rat infestation in that housing unit, that's what did the damage," Foley said.

Foley said the bureau didn't let her move. Meanwhile, her condition worsened. Foley said by the time she was diagnosed by a specialist in Boston in January 2004, who claimed that doctors at Guantanamo missed an easy diagnosis because "they didn't want to diagnose her condition."

"I'm their error that they want to go away," Foley said.

While at Guantanamo Bay, Foley, who comes from a law enforcement family, said she observed some agents spending too much time fishing, diving and partying.

"I'm told I'm working too much. I thought that was the war on terror," Foley said.

By August 2004, Foley said the disease had penetrated her central nervous system, requiring multiple surgeries and long-term care by her parents in Roslindale. Yet, she and her doctors said the FBI fought tooth-and-nail against medical interventions and surgery, fought them on worker's compensation and a transfer to Boston.

Foley said the FBI relented only after Sen. Edward Kennedy's office stepped in.

On Wednesday, Kennedy said, "The FBI and the administration need to stop stonewalling in this case. It's long past time to come clean about what really happened to this agent in Guantanamo."

When asked why they had not kept contact and looked after an agent injured in the line of duty, an FBI spokeswoman in Boston told NewsCenter 5 that Foley had failed to notify the office of her surgery an status.

"I have been deathly sick, in and out of the hospital. It is my other who has to care for me, who has to bathe me and dress me. It is my responsibility and that is their answer? That is deplorable," Foley said.

NewsCenter 5 contacted an FBI official in Washington declined comment on Wednesday.

Kenneth Kaiser of the Boston FBI office told NewsCenter 5 that "Currently, FBI officials maintain contact with her … This office will continue to offer assistance and support ... I cannot comment any further out of respect for Special Agent Foley's privacy."

Foley said she has never spoken with Kaiser and no one has been in contact with her since April." - Boston Channel

That's a foul way to treat the people who work for with you, Mueller.

LEGAL FILE Emmett Till 

The Senate is set to address the brutal race based killing of 15-year-old black teenager Emmett Till by two grown, cowardly racists, which occurred 50 years ago, that not a living soul was brought to justice for. Another case Hoover’s FBI messed up…cause they were too busy trying to destroy people like Baptist preacher Martin Luther King.

While the bill is a good idea, I’m not so sure Till would want his name on said bill after what was allowed to happen to him and the big government cover up that proceeded it.

He suffered mightily, then the government dishonored his memory in covering it up…until now. If it were you, would you want your name and your family’s name on it?

Still, at least they’re doing something…even if his mom didn’t live to see it. What that poor woman must have gone through:

“Emmett Till bill before U.S. Senate. Law would create unit to pursue unpunished slayings from the civil rights era

Since 1989, authorities in Mississippi and six other states have re-examined 29 killings from the civil rights era and made 27 arrests, leading to 22 convictions, most recently Edgar Ray Killen for orchestrating the Ku Klux Klan's 1964 killings of James Chaney, Andrew Goodman and Michael Schwerner for trying to register black voters. Killen is now serving 60 years in prison.

The U.S. Senate is expected to take up a bill this month that would create a cold-cases unit in the Justice Department to prosecute unpunished slayings from the civil rights era.

"We expect them to pass it, and after that, it's just a matter of the House acting," said Alvin Sykes of Kansas City, a civil rights activist who inspired U.S. Sen. Jim Talent, a Missouri Republican, to sponsor the legislation, now in the process of being renamed the Emmett Till Unsolved Civil Rights Crime Act, honoring the infamous 1955 killing.” - The Clarion Ledger

SPORTS Tennis US Open

The U.S. Open was great. Agassi’s speech was very touching. Of course, Roger won…again.

Roger, let somebody else win for a change (LOL). It’s like that kid on the playground that knows he can beat the living daylights out of the other kids and still won’t let them win one fight. Just teasing. Congrats to you, Roger.

Roger, won another Lexus. You know, you cold give me one of those cars. You’ve already got three! Roger is clearly trying to become a rapper with all those cars (Roger The Rapper). Kidding again.  

SPORTS Josh Hamilton

Pro-baseball player Josh Hamilton has had a well documented battle with drugs that created lost opportunities in his life. He was projected to be one of the top 5 players in the majors, but drugs derailed his dreams.

His addiction started with one drink and one line of cocaine in a tattoo parlor on a night he was depressed due to injury. It started a years long addiction that damaged his career.

It's a common problem that athletes get into trouble when they are injured and or sidelined from their respective game in some way.

He isn’t a loser. He just made a bad, regrettable choice that mushroomed into something he didn’t anticipate. He became an addict. He entered rehab, but fell off the wagon a few times. However, the the key is to keep trying, which he says he has.

Margaret Thatcher once said, “You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it.” How true.

POLITICS November Election

I once heard someone say politics is choosing between the lesser of two evils and often it truly is just that. With scandals on both sides of the aisle, both Democrat and Republican, many have publicly expressed their disappointment with the political system.

While I'm not a Democrat or a Republican, I do vote and in the face of what I personally have gone through due to Hollywood’s vileness and corrupt ways, and their close ties to so many Democrat politicians, I will not vote for them.

A vote for the Democratic party to me at this point in time is a vote for Hollywood.

The same Hollywood that via Madonna and her cohorts have put an incredible strain on me and my family, causing us so much trouble and sadness via this case fraught with invasion of privacy, criminal theft and criminal harassment, that a local Democratic politician, Kendrick Meek, didn't do jack to stop, one year later.

Therefore, I will vote Republican. I just don't understand how so many Democrat politicians can cozy up to Hollywood, which is a totally lawbreaking entity at this point and getting worse at the expense of quite a few innocent people, who had to go to the authorities about it (illegal wiretapping, harassment, stalking, assault, constitutional violations, fraud, embezzlement, grand theft larceny, terroristic threats, murder) all while spewing out entertainment that would make a pig blush, that coincidentally kids are watching.

Some of the Defendants in my case have bragged about their closeness to politicians in the Democratic party, which I find alarming. Said politicians are regularly seen with these Hollywood miscreants who have violated the law at so many people's expense in the entertainment industry, and are guests of honor at their dinners and fundraisers. 

Therefore, I won’t vote for them. The Democratic party is too close to Hollywood for my taste and I am finding Hollywood to be one of the most vile institutions on the planet that doesn’t care about their illegal conduct, you, your kids or the disgusting examples they set for others to follow.    

POLITICS When World Leaders Attack

Here at The Sound Off Column, we I’d like to proclaim this month World Leaders Wigging Out month.        

First, Chavez went off in the U.N. While I do like what Mr. Chavez has done for the poor, calling the President the devil was very harsh. To be fair, both he and President Bush need to stop calling each other names. 

Prime Minister Hugo Chavez

Then Chavez’s chief minister got a free anal-probe-prostate-exam-full-blown-cavity-search in New York at the airport. Something tells me it was a guy from Brooklyn working at the airport that talks and acts like Joey from friends, who decided to teach him a lesson over the U.N. incident. Just kidding.

Then, Former President Bubba Clinton did a Tom Cruise over at Fox News.  

Chris Wallace: Was it something I said (smirk)?
Bill Clinton: I will pimp slap you into next week, Chrissy! I work in Harlem, don't play with me.
I'll call my boys and we can rumble! Better yet, I'll call Hillary and she'll get you!


To all the world leaders out there, both past and present:

1. Relax.
2. Have a little chamomile tea.
3. Have a walk in the park and listen to the birds chirp.
4. Have a visit to your local Planetarium Zoo and listen to the dolphins…(what is the name for the noise dolphins make?)
5. Listen to a little Enya and have an enema.

I'm just kidding., Don't get mad. But seriously, we all live on the same Earth and need to work out our differences.


Countries who infiltrate other countries air space via satellite and is it lawful and moral, depending on the degree in which it is done and the outcome.

International politics can be tricky. While there are international laws governing how far each country can go, what are the rules regarding air space via satellite and what security dangers does it pose to each country. 


U.S. citizen turned Al Qaeda operative, Adam Yehiye Gadahn

A follow up to last month’s Column, where I wrote about the documentary “London Under Attack” and how a British documentary producer used a Muslim translator to tell audiences was what being said on pro-Jihad and pro-Al Qaeda web sites.

The next day, another terrorist video was released with an American Al Qaeda convert translating their message of hate into English for Western audiences. That was treason.

It was a basic threat of convert to Islam or be killed, which is unfair and infringes on the rights of each sovereign country in the world.

Scholars viewed it as an Al Qaeda PR bid to get sympathy in the face of such barbarity masquerading as beliefs of the religious kind.

As I wrote in the last Column, it is a cause “the whole world will never embrace.” 

Last month I wrote that the answer is to agree to disagree, but once again, Al Qaeda have made their mission clear, “Convert or else.”

Christianity is the largest religion in the world. There are other religions such as Buddhism. People have a right to choose their religion.

When one’s sales pitch about their religion does not work, it should end there. Not devolve into convert or else.

This is part of why terrorist groups such as these pose such a threat to humanity. They are not about peace. They are about threats, violence and destruction, if they don’t get their way.

SPIRITUAL What’s Your Legacy Going To Be

People never learn from history. When they killed Jesus, that's when His sacrifice and message saved the world. A person will become what God's will says they will become. No amount of human intervention will change that - only serve to create a lasting legacy of shame for the intervener. People remember Jesus very fondly - but the pomp of Herod is now replaced with historical disdain.

I sometimes wish these men who got on the wrong side of history could see their legacy today. But then I remember the Bible, which illustrates they can see what their names have become as history progresses. The Bible states every man will live forever somewhere in one of two places - Heaven or Hell, with the complete knowledge of who they are.


© Copyright 2002 - 2020 AG. All Rights Reserved. Web site design by Aisha for Sonustar Interactive

Aisha | Goodison Trust | Sonustar News | Judiciary Report | Sound Off Column | Celluloid Film Review | Consumer News Reviews | Compendius | United Peace Initiative | Justice And Truth | American Justice System Corruption | Medicine And Science Times